Tips and tricks for managing

[Slomo]

I've been incontinent for decades. Along the way I've picked up on some things that may help others. Got some of your own? Add them in.

 

-A thick diaper that's done its job is WAY less noticeable than a thin one that's leaked.

-Black pants hide wet spots and make it harder to see your diaper outline.

-Plastic backed diapers contain smells the best, and tend to sag much less than cloth.

-A diaper cover will help you notice any leaks before a wet spot appears.

-A PUL diaper cover will also silence most plastic diapers.

-Premium/thick diapers actually cost less "per day" than thin ones. Mostly because you'll need changing less often, and will go through fewer diapers each day.

-Remove your diapers from their packaging for at least a week before needing them. They come compressed, and allowing them to expand some means they will absorb and wick much better when used.

-Fold the diaper in half length-wise. This will create a center channel that help with absorption and also removes the folds from packaging.

-When you do get a good fit, try to memorize where the tapes ended up at. And next time put the tapes in that same spot. No more worrying about getting a good fit, and no more having to readjust.

-When putting on a diaper, avoid touching or rubbing where the tapes should end up at. Otherwise you're depositing some of the oil on your hands to that spot, which will weaken the tape stickiness. Also, once stuck on, give them a quick rub. This will help improve their grip and prevent the tapes from popping off later.

-Staying well hydrated means your pee will smell much less.

-Wear one pant size larger, with a comfort or relaxed fit, and you'll be able to hide your diaper much better.

-People generally don't stare at your crotch, and genrally won't notice your diaper as much as you think.

-And finally, wearing a diaper is neither illegal nor immoral. No matter your reason. You really can wear them without worrying of being caught or found out. And if you are, just say it's personal and you don't want to talk about it. No explanations or reasons are necessary on your part (unless you want to).

Edited April 3 by Slomo

[John Davis]

Excellent observations, Slomo.  It is obvious that they were learned over a long period of time.  There is nothing like experience.

[John Davis]

I will add that, IMHO fit, fit, and fit are the most important criteria in selecting a diaper.  I put fit first because even the most expensive and absorben diaper made will leak if it does not fit you correctly.

--John

 

[Iken]

Awesome observation. I wonder what do you do for the diaper bag.

[Slomo]

Ah, a few more tips then.

-If you're using a good diaper, stay hydrated, aren't prone to rashes, and are not bowell incontinent, then you usually won't need anything more than a spare diaper for changing during the day. I keep a couple of spare diapers under my car seat just for this. (And yes, I take it in hand to the nearest restroom, as long ago I stopped being embarrassed by them and stopped caring what others think).

-For a day trip or overnight, a plain old backpack or laptop bag works well as a diaper bag. And yes, there are situations where it will be searched (airport, theme parks, etc). See the next tip,  otherwise trust me when I say they don't care.

-Powder, wipes and rash creams show up as a liquid on an xray, so only ever carry travel sizes. Other must have items are at least two diapers, a change of pants, and two plain diaper pins (can be used to hold a popped tape in place, or for any other clothing mishap). Also, practice changing while standing up then skip hauling around a changing mat large enough for you.

[Brian]

@Slomo

i've also noticed one thing. in addition to the things that you're talking about, it's always a good thing to have:

-- nitrelle Gloves, so when you have to put on topicals, you end up being able to put on a pair of gloves and be able to use the topicals or any of the gels or lotions, and keep that off of your fingers. once you're done you remove the from the bottom of your wrist and turn them inside out and throw them away. this way all of the topical stuff ointments and Whatnot are on the glove, and when you pull it off you actually throw that away. this will allow you to put the diaper on and not have to worry about what happens should you touch the tapes. If your fingers are not loaded with this gooey stuff or goopy stuff, you won't have to deal with your tapes not sticking. You can use your gloves to do anything that you need to apply any topicals or any ointments or whatever, but that way you can take off the gloves and throw them away and not have all that on your hands.

Some of the things that you use when you're doing diaper changes can be quite sticky, or oily or whatever, so you don't want any of that touching your front panels your tapes or sometimes even the diaper itself, because the diaper can disintegrate if you if you use way too much inside the diaper. I have learned from experience that you want to keep your topicals on your gloves rather than all over your fingers of your hands. when I decided that I was going to use the gloves, it was one heck of a godsend.

As far as everything else you posted, it's right on the money! all of those things are good Suggestions for managing incontinence or diaper changes, and one of the things that I would add is to make sure you have the proper type of disposal bags and disposal system so that you can quickly get rid of dirty diapers, and they won't smell up your bathroom or your house. Remember that most people that don't wear diapers can probably automatically automatically tell when they're in a house when someone wears diapers because of the smell. people who wear diapers usually become nose blind which means we don't realize there is a smell, because we're so used to the environment But other people would.

Very good tricks very good advice!

Brian

[Iken]

For me, I always have two kinds of diaper bags with me. One is my regular diaper bag that comes with 4 diapers, wipes, 4 boosters and spare clothes for when I get soaked really badly. I also have a portable diaper changing bag with me. It has a wipe, diaper and a booster. The portable diaper changing pad is the one that infants have but use them because it's very discreet and know one knows that I have an adult diaper in them. 

[Iken]

Here's an example of using a portable diaper changing pad.

 

[John Davis]

In addition to disposal bags for soiled diapers, I always have a larger bag for the dreaded possibility of soiled clothing.  If we have a truly catastrophic bowel accident, "stuff" may leak down our legs onto our socks, and even onto our shoes.😱 

Although I normally use a military-style messenger bag when I need to keep diapers, etc. with me, I keep a "disaster kit" in the trunk of my car with extra diapers and a complete change of clothes and shoes.

Admittedly I may be overly anxious about bowel accidents, but, when it happens....

--John

[Zombie_Turtle]

For the plastic diapers that don't have a landing zone on the front panel I have put a piece of packing tape across in line with the top tape.  This makes my own landing zone and keeps it from getting stretchy and saggy after wearing it. 

 

I second everything else mentioned.  Also learned: 

"-Remove your diapers from their packaging for at least a week before needing them. They come compressed, and allowing them to expand some means they will absorb and wick much better when used." 🤯

 

[Iken]

6 hours ago, John Davis said:

In addition to disposal bags for soiled diapers, I always have a larger bag for the dreaded possibility of soiled clothing.  If we have a truly catastrophic bowel accident, "stuff" may leak down our legs onto our socks, and even onto our shoes.😱 

Although I normally use a military-style messenger bag when I need to keep diapers, etc. with me, I keep a "disaster kit" in the trunk of my car with extra diapers and a complete change of clothes and shoes.

Admittedly I may be overly anxious about bowel accidents, but, when it happens....

--John

You can't be too overly prepared for any accidents. Accidents do happen and being overly prepared for them will save you in the long run.

[Slomo]

20 hours ago, Iken said:

For me, I always have two kinds of diaper bags with me. One is my regular diaper bag that comes with 4 diapers, wipes, 4 boosters and spare clothes for when I get soaked really badly. I also have a portable diaper changing bag with me. It has a wipe, diaper and a booster. The portable diaper changing pad is the one that infants have but use them because it's very discreet and know one knows that I have an adult diaper in them. 

 

11 hours ago, Iken said:

You can't be too overly prepared for any accidents. Accidents do happen and being overly prepared for them will save you in the long run.

Seconded, though not everyone will need this much, nor will all these tips work for everyone. Case in point, mastering putting on a diaper while standing so you won't need to carry around a changing mat big enough for an adult. Well, not everyone can do that either.

I'd say the import thing for anyone to take away is to find what each individual needs and what helps them manage it all best.

[Iken]

27 minutes ago, Slomo said:

 

Seconded, though not everyone will need this much, nor will all these tips work for everyone. Case in point, mastering putting on a diaper while standing so you won't need to carry around a changing mat big enough for an adult. Well, not everyone can do that either.

I'd say the import thing for anyone to take away is to find what each individual needs and what helps them manage it all best.

It works for me being incontinent and many times I prefer changing my diaper on the floor, bed or diaper changing table because I get a better seal and I won't leak as much.

[Zombie_Turtle]

I change on the floor at home and standing in public restrooms.   laying down is much easier for me and I prefer to change that way.

[Iken]

18 hours ago, Zombie_Turtle said:

I change on the floor at home and standing in public restrooms.   laying down is much easier for me and I prefer to change that way.

I tried to do a diaper change standing up but I can never get the tapes on right. I prefer diaper changes on the floor or on a changing table or bed. It's much easier and I get a good diaper fit.

[Slomo]

1 hour ago, Iken said:

I tried to do a diaper change standing up but I can never get the tapes on right. I prefer diaper changes on the floor or on a changing table or bed. It's much easier and I get a good diaper fit.

Very understandable. It took me more practice to change while standing than it did laying down too.

Remember my tip about memorizing where the tapes end up though? The next time you do do have a good fit, try to see where the tapes ended up at. You can use distance from edges, how far apart the tapes are from each other, the padding underneath as a mark point, or any other features like tape landing zone or even prints/lines. Also try to remember where the top back and top front of the diaper ended up in relation to your body.

Then the next time you want to try changing while standing, completely forget about trying to get the right alignment or fit. All you need to do is put the diaper and the tapes in the exact same spot. And voiola, it's an instant diaper change (like cooking with just add water). Easier said than done, I know, but once mastered it makes changing much easier, and incredibly fast too.

As example, I typically change in under a minute- from taking old one off to new one completely on (not including time for wipes cream or powder). It's also part of why I prefer Crinklz, my lower tapes go 1/2 inch from the bottom edge and are placed fully before the green wavy line. My top tapes go 1 inch below the top edge, and full over the green wavy line. Believe it or not, I can even pre-place the bottom tapes then step into them like a pullup and finish taping the top. A necessity I found when trying to change in a porta potty once. No laying down needed, and definitely no leaning on a wall to hold it in place before taping.

[Dan]

On 4/4/2023 at 7:35 PM, Zombie_Turtle said:

I change on the floor at home and standing in public restrooms.   laying down is much easier for me and I prefer to change that way.

I prefer lying down too, but I don’t like the floor. It’s too hard and I have to get myself up again. That’s why I prefer my bed at home. I always keep a changing pad on my bed.

[Brian]

I just realized that I had forgotten something in my management strategy and I might have mentioned it before, but I can't remember!

When you're dealing with stuff that you take off, you end up taking your diaper off bagging it up and throwing it into your disposal Can. Every week or so you end up emptying this can and making sure you have a nice fresh bag and that it is all clean and smells good. In addition to that, when I take off a diaper, I regularly have a pair of trifectas, which is the North Shore brand of diaper cover. When I take a diaper cover off, many times I have gone through the diaper, and something has leaked on or into it, and it is designed to do this. I would take it off, and put it into another container.

This container is a large bucket. I'm not talking about a huge bucket that is really tall, I'm talking about maybe a medium sized bucket that you would find paint in or something like that. Luckily, at most hardware stores you can buy the bucket and it isn't that big. What I do is I take a white garbage bag, And I put that into the bucket. When I do a diaper change, I take the diaper off, throw that in a disposal bag throw the disposal bag into the receptacle, and throw the wet Used trifectas into this bucket, which is holding a white trash bag. I then take the buckets top and put it over the bag closing it off which helps to maintain integrity so that it does not smell up the bathroom. once a week or so, after I get like say 10 or 15 of these into a bucket, I simply take them out of the bucket and throw them into a washer, and I do it on warm wash, and then I do it on delicate for drying. You to maintain integrity and hopefully your diaper covers will last longer

They always say in the directions, that these diaper covers last about 50 to 75 washings. Change them again to get new ones I have enough to last me. I just change him out, but I don't want to change them until they start falling apart Or there is a definite reason reason to change them to brand new ones, as they cost about $24 apiece: they are well worth the money, And my strategy usually works the best, because that will allow me to know when it is time to take out diaper trash as well as when to do those in the laundry. I usually take in two sections I do the laundry first, get that started Then I come upstairs and grab the bucket And its entirety and bring it downstairs. I then take everything out of the bucket cover the bucket and then put it on top of the washer until it is done. When I come upstairs I open the bucket and spray it out, and if it is necessary I change the white bag. I have a clean set of white bags that are ready to receive the clean and dry ones so that I always keep two sets of clean ones around. Have clean ones available and I don't have to keep worrying about that.

Anybody that is wearing diapers of any type should always invest in proper equipment to be able to deal with their incontinence. One of the things that I have learned is that diaper covers will help you as well as anything else that has been mentioned. Since I am not at cloth diaper person, that might be something that you would have to ask somebody that is familiar with when you're dealing with cloth diapers, but as far as I can tell my strategy works well. Definitely invest in a large bucket or a size bucket, to keep your while they are waiting to be laundered, And when you're done make sure that you cover it so that it does not smell up the bathroom. As people have taught me, if you're wearing diapers, you become immune to the smell, known as " Nose blindness" because you are used to your own smell, and somebody else might not be. So people can smell it in your house, so the best thing to do is try to keep the smell to a minimum, which is what I try to do.

Brian

[John Davis]

19 hours ago, Brian said:

if you're wearing diapers, you become immune to the smell, known as " Nose blindness" because you are used to your own smell,

Very good point for all of us to be aware of.

--John

[Scarth]

one tip i havent seen here .. i have a roll of white duct tape handy if one of my tapes rips 

[John Davis]

Scarth, that is a very good tip.  To keep the tape very small for my bag, I sawed off a section of pencil and then rolled several inches of duct tape around it.  It is not a lot, but it is enough to fix a broken tape or cover a tear and does not take up much space.

--John