zzyzx

@John Davis

I've only had one negative reaction out of a doctor, and I wasn't wearing diapers at the time, instead asking for a prescription prior to ordering replacement (cloth) diapers for dealing with the occasional nocturnal enuresis at that time. 

Now, I've added on issues from early on set BPH, so, both my primary care and urologist have seen me in my cloth diapers (and protective pants), and generally no issue...  Last urology appointment included a cystoscopy, and the urologist told me to leave my "shorts" on (while waiting for the procedure) instead of saying diapers.... 

@Brian

This is only my opinion.  I have had two UGI procedures years ago and one LGI procedure more recently.  For the LGI, yes, the prep is "interesting".  I understand there are at least two styles of prep used to clear the colon.  I can understand why you might want to use the hospital for the prep work.  In my opinion that is the worst part of getting the procedure.  I find typically, the doctors will use an IV delivered knock out drug for the procedure so you are "out of it" while they run the scope, and won't remember what goes on.  With this medication you definitely need someone assisting you after the procedure to get home.  If you normally drive, you need to not do that I think for about 12 hours after the procedure.  You might be able to handle your normal assisted transit (for wheel chair transportation) on your own.  I'd discuss that with your doctor / medical team to get their opinion on that.  One of my sisters has done the LGI procure without that  knockout drug without issues.  With my lack of feeling pain (typically till you find the nerve and actually hit it), I probably could have gotten away without using the knockout medication.  So, yes, in my opinion, the prep is worse then the actual procedure.

For me, I had the oral stuff in a set of consumption in the evening with the colonoscopy the next morning.  There was one occurance where I should have been closer to the toilet than I was.  The rest of the times, I was better handling.  My memory recalls drinking the solution in two rounds, I forget how far apart.  By the end you are cleaned out, and will have no food from a certain time prior through finishing the procedure.  Once cleaned out, I would expect you will only use your diaper for # 1.... 

As to diapers, number would depend on how you manage the prep.  I will admit that you may want to bring more than you think you will need.  The clean out can hit with sudden need to get to the toilet, and I can see where that would be a challenge for you.  You will not be in a diaper while they scope.  You'll have to ask them about how they want to handle urine in that situation.  For me it wasn't an issue.  I did relieve the bladder after arriving the procedure, and had no issues through getting dressed again to go home, despite having issues with (at the time occasional) nocturnal enuresis.

Yes.Usually about once a year to get a prescription for various needed supplies, so that if I ever get questioned on FSA or other expenditures I have an actual written prescription showing need.However, not too much beyond that.  Prostate check and general discussion on incontinence gets deferred to the Urology appointments....

First time was when the acute onset of secondary nocturnal enuresis hit when I started a set of medication to knock out a sinus infection.  After hearing that I had (only a few) incidences of bed-wetting as a child, he figured it would "go away on its own" after the treatment for the infection was done.  I couldn't get across that I felt something had changed....  As I kid, it only rarely happened, max once a night, and not on consecutive nights.  Long store short, once I was off the medications, I figured out how I "sensed" things had shifted for the second time as an adult, and this time it changed occasional nocturia into occasional secondary nocturnal enuresis...  Doctors still don't have a good set of tests for checking how a person senses pain, smell, touch, etc.  I've known since elementary school that how I sense things (starting with pain) was different from "normal".  I did get a urinalysis out of it (showing no UTI, etc.) and if my memory serves right, a short prescription for oxybutin which didn't help, and if wanted, a referral to a urologist.  I ended up spending some time at the local university medical library on weekends (when parking was free) researching the available research on incontinence / enuresis at the time and really only found studies of (a) women with what I considered small bladders (8 oz holding) and (b) children (mainly boys) that still had issues with enuresis and the success / failure rate to overcome that.

A later primary care physician balked when I wanted a prescription for diapers for the bed-wetting (prior to planning to use FSA funds).  He went off the deep end on the fetish side.  Needless to say I found another primary care doctor.

Due to current insurance, currently have two primary care doctors (and need to transition to a third before retiring).  One comes at no cost to use, the other was my primary care prior to the current employer opting in to a plan that has the zero cost primary doctor visits at a specific clinic.  The older one has no problem with my discussing prescription needs, and that has included disposable diapers not originally designed for medical....  but do work better for me when cloth isn't the best option....  Reminds me its about time for my approximately annual discussion again...

Caught an auto correct error.  Last medication line should read:

• The fourth option I'm aware of is the anti-diuretic hormone, which would probably help me, but I don't expect it would resolve my bed-wetting issue based on my current maximum functional bladder capacity.

Medications:

• The general class of medications used for bladder issues, which Oxibutin (sp?) is one of, have negative impact on my brain function...  (Negatively impacts playing Sudoku, and my work).  OK, there are several medications that are variations in this class of medication.
• Mybetric (sp?) was the first in a new class of drugs (the only drug in its class the last I checked) and I was on it a year, where I think it helped me retrain to regain some of my lost bladder capacity after having the Resume procedure.  I had a 90 trial supply followed by a 1 year prescription.  Before I got the last refill, my (employer's) medical plan dropped it from the list and significantly upped the cost if it had been covered at all.  So, I dropped the last 3 months (90 days) of the planned test.  While I tolerated the drug fine, to me it wasn't worth over $1K for a 90 day supply, and other then probably helping me get back some of my previous functional capacity, it wasn't solving any of my other bladder issues. 
• My urologist has mentioned there is now a third category of drugs (containing one drug last I checked),  I haven't investigated this option, and believe it would also cost similar to Mybetric if I would try to get it. 
• The fourth option I'm aware of is the anti-diuretic hormone, which partially help me, but I don't expect it would resolve my bed-wetting issue based on my current maximum functional bladder capacity.

I believe that covers the four classes of medications used for incontinence issues.

As to my incontinence:

• Started with occasional secondary nocturnal enuresis, with a oversized (from most Urologist perspective) bladder - where I would release about 24oz in the first release at night - when it hit (i.e. heavy bed-wetting). 
• With early onset BPH, I picked up a light post mictriction drip and after watching and waiting a while I believe I have also picked up sometimes slight occasional leakage when I get the urge to go.  With this I now have reduced maximum functional capacity (currently about 50% of what I used to have), and the occasional bed-wetting is now basically nightly.  (Of the three items: (a) being properly hydrated, (b) getting a good nights sleep and (c) being dry in the morning, I can get at most two of these on any one night.)

32 minutes ago, Zombie_Turtle said:

I saw Tykables had tear away velcro cargo pants.  Those seem interesting as something that could be helpful for traveling and trying to change at a rest stop.  Other adaptive clothing I've seen in the doesn't fully come apart. 

@Zombie_Turtle

I have an older Tykables Jeans and also their "cargo" shorts.  This is back when they were using snaps.  I don't know if they switch out the snaps for Velcro and kept the same design, since I haven't picked up the new style at this point.

The old pants are full length snaps from crotch to leg hem.  And yes, they fully open up, but don't fully "come off" that way -- as the opening on these are on the inseam and not the outside seam of the pants. 

These are also aimed at the fetish market and unless you have long legs and get the short length, you will either need to fold up the bottom of the pants (like a kid wearing new pants that they'll grow into) or get them modified to fit your length if you intend to wear them normally.

Another issue with their pants and shorts is they are cut low....  If you aren't wearing a romper or onsie with it, expect the top of your diaper to be exposed.    So, I'd recommend only getting one to try at first to see if your OK with the cut.  If it works for you, yes these are functional adaptive clothing, and cut to be worn over diapers (i.e. room for the diaper in the seat, etc.).

I also have Tykables jean shortalls.  I have actually worn those in warm weather on vacation.  I find it convenient in that I don't have to drop my pants or shorts to the bath room floor while pulling down my diaper when I make it to the toilet.  Or, if (when) I get worse, need to change a diaper while traveling.  I usually can manage getting to restrooms during the day, but if there was a major delay on the road, I could see where I might need a diaper change at the next rest stop.  And yes, this would be more convenient then having to take regular shorts or pants off to change a diaper.

10 hours ago, Dan said:

Unfortunately, a lot of the Tykable stuff is out of stock, especially the larger sizes.

Tykables stock is interesting.  At times, they are out.  At other times, plenty.  The delays between when they order and when they get supplies along with when certain sizes are out of stock is very notifiable (specifically in the clothing).  Since their stuff in manufactured in China, there is a significant delay in them receiving product after ordering....  This is why for certain clothing (white t-shirt (onsies) and white rompers) I'll stock up in advance when they are in stock.  This is also why I have some ABU white onesies (t-shirts) because Tykables was out of stock longer than I expected.....  I would say, this is typical of Tykables....  While I mostly like Tykables (clothing) quality, some times what is in stock is more for the ABDL market than overlapping with the incontinent market.  And sometimes, they are even more out of stock.

8 hours ago, John Davis said:

Like Slomo, I stay very well hydrated.  I rarely detect urine odor and I never have had anyone else comment on it.  However, I worry about others being able to tell.  The ladies seem to have a sharper sense of small than most men.

--John

@John Davis: It might not be as true now, but it used to be the mothers that kept track of when the young ones needed changing -- and that's why I think women are more likely to notice.  The only time I've had a smell comment was using a bit too much baby powder.  A older mother (kids were adult) liked my smell, but didn't place it.... 

I have a standard mattress (allergy, bed bug, spill, etc.) protector, then a standard fitted bed pad and bed shit, then add a reusable incontinence pad, that I sleep on top of, then standard bedding above.  I wear a triple layer of four layer diapers with a protective pant.  It used to be the old VI Products or Comco vinyl pants.  Now it is usually one of the Gary manufactured PUL pants, but I continue to look at my options on this.  Unless I'm very well hydrated things are contained to the cloth diapers.  On a rare time when a leak happens, the bed pad takes the rest..... or possibly the top sheet(s) if they get tangled into the mix.

5 hours ago, Zombie_Turtle said:

I ordered some things to try from AB Universe.  Haven't tried them yet. Was wondering what some of the folks that are familiar with their products thought about how they stack up against InControl or some of the Tykables stuff.  I got the Peek ABU, and Super Dry Kids.  The Super Dry kids looked interesting because it has 2 tapes and would maybe not cut into my damn hip.  The Peek ABU is rated for 7500ml.  Do these live up to their price tag?  

Thanks in advance.

@Zombie_Turtle:  I have not tried ABU's disposable diapers or doublers.

I do own some of ABU's onsies / t-shirts.  I bought from ABU because Tykables was out of stock on the white t-shirt (onsies) and white rompers.  I'm OK with the ABU onsies, but I do prefer Tykables over ABU.  In my opinion, the slight stretch in the Tykables fabric, the grip of the snaps, the cut at the neck and the overall quality I prefer over the ABU set.  The one issue with Tykables is the grip of the snaps and how they attached sometimes do lead to tears in the fabric / failure at that point.  I've seen it more with the older Tykables white rompers over the white t-shirt (onsies). 

I think both companies under current ownership are good businesses that are reasonable to buy from, once you are past that they are AB/DL based companies vs a medical needs based company.

9 hours ago, AUG168 said:

Anyone else have incontinence associated with BPH?

It all started 5 years ago when I would leak after urinating (PMD). Then I had COVID and thought I had a UTI. Turns out I have OAB, all associated with an enlarged prostate. Initially I was told I had prostate cancer but tests proved otherwise thankfully.
 

It started off with wearing shields then eventually pads. Things have progressed to where I use 2-3 pads a day or a pullup. At night I use trading pants for comfort. 
 

I tried flowmax and Cialis. Flowmax made me dizzy and Cialis gives me leg pains.

I really don't want things to get worse but I'm trying to control what I can. Would like to hear from others that have BPH.

@AUG168:  I need to copy and paste my response to your welcome message here, and make some adjustments from your additional notes above.  So, from the welcome reply, with some edits:

I also had early on set of BPH and with my slightly high PSA numbers opted for watch and wait.  After trying the medications for a 90 day trial, I told the doctor I wasn't refilling them due to side affects....   Unfortunately, I waited a bit long and end up with reduced bladder capacity from the effects of having BPH for a while before having surgical treatment.  From your comments above, you have also been reviewing your PSA numbers, and I assume you have had a (rectal?) needle biopsy of the prostate that resulted in not finding cancer.  I have not had the needle biopsy and instead rely on the PSA and Free PSA numbers along with the fact that genetically, we tend to "grow" things (like polyps, and early onset BPH), but don't have cancer.....

I see your comments in this thread about heavier dribbling (light incontinence), I assume along with the OAB diagnosis the Urologist suspects the bladder wall has thickened and muscle strengthened.  If that is the case, you may already be in the same boat I am with reduced bladder capacity. I also had developed a light PMD and I think I also have some like leakage now from OAB urges.

If you are only aware of TURP type procedures for BPH issues, please look into the minimally evasive techniques that are currently available.  Depending on your urologist, they may not offer them and you might have to find a different one to review those options.  Personally, I choose to get the Rezūm procedure.  There are other minimally evasive procedures now available.  One issue with using the procedure I did is you don't get a tissue sample to test for cancer.  In my case, I'm low risk of cancer, and even though my PSA numbers have returned to "above normal" for what is the "normal expected range" my Urologist calls my numbers as "supported by the size of my prostate", so not out of the ordinary for the large size.  And we continue to monitor the trend lines of my PSA and Free PSA numbers about every six months.  As to the Rezume procedure, it only reduces the prostate around the urethra and leaves the rest in tact.    I had my procedure shortly after the two year follow up from the original experimental procedures was published and the procedure was cleared for normal practice.  (It was interesting to get the diagnostic code used, needed to clear the procedure with my insurance, as it was very new at the time....)  A piece of me wishes the procedure had been available a few years earlier AND that I noticed the slow decrease in bladder capacity over time earlier.

Feel free to ask me questions.  And I'm sure others can speak to other procedures that they have have reviewed or had used.

My day time issues don't appear to be as bad as you documented, and I'm post the Rezume procedure by a few years.  However I think recently things are starting to act up again....

@Brian / @John Davis:  How is the fit of the Trifecta's compared to the normal Gary PUL pants?  Same size or?

I've found the current round of Gary's pants (from like from https://www.adultclothdiaper.com/Leakmaster-PUL-Pants ) are a bit loose in the legs when I get the size right for my cloth diapers.  They are mostly working, but that is mainly because I'm not typically pushing the cloth diapers to maximum saturation.  And I don't like the cut of the PUL pants I've tried from Kins.  Is Northshore's product just a branded item still manufactured by Gary?  Gary appears to be the only major manufacture left in the US.

18 hours ago, John Davis said:

What did you all choose with regard to the diaper itself?  During really intense workouts you sweat so much that you do not generate much pee.  For those workouts it would seem that the absorption of a heavy diaper would not be needed.  Are you using a pullup or a tabbed diaper?

Ah, forgot to mention...  I use cloth diapers and currently typically a PUL cover.  This avoids the clumping issue....  Sweat will leave a different wetness pattern with the cloth diaper than the other usage.....

Since I don\'t have a major day time issue, I keep a day back in the car with needed supplies - just in case.

9 hours ago, John Davis said:

How long can you wear a diaper before the urine odor becomes noticeable to others?  Note that others may notice our odors before we do.

Of course, this will be affected by many factors.  A plastic-backed diaper will help contain odor as will vinyl or rubber "plastic" pants.  Staying well hydrated will significantly reduce urine odor.  A diaper with mostly SAP and very little fluff pulp will contain odor better than a diaper with more fluff pulp.  Personal deodorants like Nullo will reduce urine odor.

IMHO, odor should not be noticeable until six hours or more.  By eight hours there is a significant risk of others noticing the odor, although they may not identify it as urine odor.

What do you think?

--John

Unfortunately, I know I'm nose blind to my self till it gets a bit aged....

Fortunately, I don't have a major day issue.  And I haven't had anyone comment yet during the day.  And as a single person, I don't have anyone to complain when I get up the morning (and visiting family, haven't had comments on those occasions). 

Also note that I typically use cloth diapers, so mileage will vary....

12 hours ago, AUG168 said:

Hey there everyone. I’m 55 yo and live in FL. I have BPH and OAB. I’ve tried medication with no luck, doctor doesn’t suggest surgery yet. So for now it’s pullups and pads during the day and training pants at night.

@AUG168: Welcome.

I also had early on set of BPH and with my slightly high PSA numbers opted for watch and wait.  After trying the medications for a 90 day trial, I told the doctor I wasn't refilling them due to side affects....   Unfortunately, I waited a bit long and end up with reduced bladder capacity from the effects of having BPH for a while before having surgical treatment.

If you are dribbling (light incontinence), I assume along with the OAB diagnosis the Urologist suspects the bladder wall has thickened and muscle strengthened.  If that is the case, you may already be in the same boat I am with reduced bladder capacity. 

If you are only aware of TURP type procedures for BPH issues, please look into the minimally evasive techniques that are currently available.  Depending on your urologist, they may not offer them and you might have to find a different one to review those options.  Personally, I choose to get the Rezūm procedure.  There are other minimally evasive procedures now available.  One issue with using the procedure I did is you don't get a tissue sample to test for cancer.  In my case, I'm low risk of cancer, and even though my PSA numbers have returned to "above normal" for what is the "normal expected range" my Urologist calls my numbers as "supported by the size of my prostate", so not out of the ordinary for the large size.  And we continue to monitor the trend lines of my PSA and Free PSA numbers about every six months.  As to the Rezume procedure, it only reduces the prostate around the urethra and leaves the rest in tact.    I had my procedure shortly after the two year follow up from the original experimental procedures was published and the procedure was cleared for normal practice.  (It was interesting to get the diagnostic code used, needed to clear the procedure with my insurance, as it was very new at the time....)  A piece of me wishes the procedure had been available a few years earlier AND that I noticed the slow decrease in bladder capacity over time earlier.

1 hour ago, Incont said:

Everyone is supposed to be able to edit their posts, but for some reason the software is being picky about what posts can be edited. I haven't figured out the issue yet.

I suspect it is others viewing or potentially replying that is blocking editing.  Now that you have replied to the message, it is now locked from being edited.

2 hours ago, Iken said:

I know being incontinent and going to the gym alot, I wonder how many of you who do go to the gym alot. How do you deal with Incontinence and going to the gym to work out.

For me, I should get in more than I do...  When I do, I still wear one of my white oneies or rompers (i.e. white tee-shirt showing), with dark (regular, not gym) shorts, possibly a hooded sweat shirt and proceed as I did prior to wearing diapers full time....  I'm fortunate to mostly have day time control, so at the end of the working, anything damp is mostly from sweat....  My preference is a recumbent bike.  Need to get in more....

9 minutes ago, zzyzx said:

@John Davis:  Agree on your comment about "by supporting others we ourselves gain so much emotionally."  Some times each of us needs to let out some of the frustration or other emotions that hit while dealing with things....  This site can be productive in helping others and ourselves. 

I've been pleasantly surprised that Mikey's new board here is as active as it is.  Prior to this one, I haven't seen an active incontinence support board that wasn't a sub-site of a fetish board.  Other incontinence only boards don't get enough traffic and discussion.  OK, so most of us so far talking on this site are active on some of the other boards...  But here we can get to the point from just the incontinence view, while acknowledging other things that need to be said.  And I expect over time, more folks that wouldn't touch the fetish based sites will be willing to join in here.  I probably could have used a site like this several years ago.

@Incont:  Ok, Mikey.....  How do I edit a post?  Is that restricted till I get enough posts?  or something else.  I was going to go back and add a flag for your account above.....  But I only get the share and report options from the three dots right now...  Hmmm...  looks like time (or others viewing) may have an impact....  I can edit this one, but not the prior post.

1 hour ago, John Davis said:

Brian, you nailed it.  And it is our challenge to pay it forward by providing as much support to others as we can.  Of course, that is not completely altruistic - by supporting others we ourselves gain so much emotionally.

--John

@John Davis:  Agree on your comment about "by supporting others we ourselves gain so much emotionally."  Some times each of us needs to let out some of the frustration or other emotions that hit while dealing with things....  This site can be productive in helping others and ourselves. 

I've been pleasantly surprised that Mikey's new board here is as active as it is.  Prior to this one, I haven't seen an active incontinence support board that wasn't a sub-site of a fetish board.  Other incontinence only boards don't get enough traffic and discussion.  OK, so most of us so far talking on this site are active on some of the other boards...  But here we can get to the point from just the incontinence view, while acknowledging other things that need to be said.  And I expect over time, more folks that wouldn't touch the fetish based sites will be willing to join in here.  I probably could have used a site like this several years ago.

On 4/7/2023 at 6:06 AM, Slomo said:

Yeah, oops, thanks. I did forget to mention powder! Though talc powder is near impossible to get in the US now, corn starch works just as good.

@Slomo: I claim corn starch doesn't work as good for me.  I think the talc powder helps neutralize PH balance where I don't think I get the same affect with corn starch.  It also doesn't feel the same to me, and I question if using corn starch would feed a yeast infection (when trying to start up).

I don't know anywhere in the US or Canada where one can find talc powder now.  The generic brands went off the market before J&J pulled their brand.  From other comments, I know its still available in Australia and Europe.  I stocked up while the stores were selling out the stock on hand.  Don't know how long that's going to last me....Yes there are some folks with concerns about talc powder, however it is the legal system not the medical system in the US that has caused this disappearing act.

1 hour ago, John Davis said:

I am among several here who are fecal incontinent.  Those here are the "survivors" - those who have managed to cope with that form of incontinence.  Unfortunately, many have not and tend to isolate themselves from society and avoiding all social contact.

A few years back I was shocked to read a 2016 JAMA article that reported a survey of patients hospitalized with serious conditions who listed fecal incontinence as being a state worse than, or equal to, death.😱  Now, that was not a survey of the general public, but it does reflect the very negative attitutes toward bowel incontinence held by many.  Many newly FI are reported in medical studies to have had suicidal ideations.  It is unclear how many attempted suicide.

For myself, I admit that I had very negative views before actually becoming FI and learning to manage it somewhat effectively.

How do you think the public views fecal incontinence? For that matter, how does your family and relations view FI?

--John

If I had to deal with this at my current work place, I think it would be an issue....  And would at that point definitely end up with a discussion with HR concerning ADA and other rules.

1 hour ago, John Davis said:

What is the "Ultimate Taboo?"  With the exception of murder, rape, and cannibalism I think it may be fecal incontinence.😟  This particularly is true of the general public who have little knowledge or understanding of FI.

For those who must know that you wear diapers, do you tell them you are "incontinent" or "bowel incontinent."  I confess to not sharing the "bowel" part unless it is to a medical practitioner who absolutely must know.  My dermatologist who conducts a full-body scan sees my diaper.  I had mentioned to her beforehand that I am "incontinent."  I certainly did not volunteer that I am bowel incontinent.

What about you?

--John

@John Davis: I fortunate enough to mostly not need to deal with this at this point in time.  However, the last medication added definitely has an impact on on the lower GI track.  I would say based on how things are now, I used to be constipated.  Based on how I "sense" things, I think I get away with more of timed toileting (around meals, mainly near breakfast), as urges in both areas may have short timers before I need to be in the bathroom.  If I ever have a stroke, I expect it will be game over in this area -- at least for a while during recovery.  So, at this point, it is just "incontinent" for me.

13 hours ago, Slomo said:

Which brings me to a Health Savings Account (HSA), or a Flexible Savings Account (FSA). You ask your employer to set this up for you, and they take out a certain amount of money from your paycheck- before taxes. They deposit this money into that account, which you can spend on government pre-approved items (there an online list). And yes the government includes adult diapers as an approved, tax free purchase with any HSA/FSA debit card. Note: there is no government requirement for disclosing why you may need diapers. You can get them regardless of that. However, be prepared as you may still need to disclose what you are purchasing to your employer or HSA/FSA banking holder.

After that you can make an online or in-store purchase with that debit card. Make sure you save all receipts too, as the banking card holder or IRS may ask for proof of all purchases on that card. And now you know why most everyone just buys diapers on their own.

@Slomo: This brings me to the "fun" I had when I started working for my current company.  I reviewed the "approved" list prior to setting my contribution to the FSA account for the first year, and it included "incontinence" supplies as a covered item.  So, with a doctor's prescription in hand (not necessarily required), I bought a set of cloth diapers and submitted the receipt (with documentation of need) requesting reimbursement for the diapers.  They came back and rejected it because they had a conflicting rule, where they listed diapers explicitly and not covered by this plan.  After filing a complaint on this I eventually won and got my reimbursement.  So, coverage is both based on IRS rules and what the company sets up for its acceptable list.  If I had gotten adult disposable "briefs" I wouldn't have had the issue.  : (

And I do believe if asked, you may need to show medical need for this type of item.

I haven't tried to get the diapers under my insurance plan....  I think the cloth diapers could be done under durable medical equipment on a low frequency.

Your mileage may vary....

On 4/4/2023 at 11:41 AM, Slomo said:

Absorbent brief, pad, pullup, pampers, diaper.

We've all heard them call one thing or another, but so seldom do we hear them called what they are. Diapers. (To be clear, I'm referring to a disposable adult brief which has tapes or tabs. Either cloth-like or plastic backed).

Someone once said a rose by any other name would smell just as sweet. I say not if you call it putrid stink weed of instant death.

 

To me, proper names actually are important. If you say you need pampers, then be ready to try and squeeze into a diaper that's 10 sizes too small. Pads, hope you don't plan on getting up anytime soon. Or pullups, hope you don't need something more absorbent. Like an actual diaper an adult might need.

I've even been played by this bad wording too. In a hospital I reported I needed diapers. The nurse said ok, let me bring you some pads. And sure enough, what I got was not the diaper I needed. Nor would the actual pad I got be what I needed when going to my physical therapy.

Look at it this way too. Most would recognize there is a generalized stigma among the public towards anyone other than a baby or senior needing diapers. Yet we here are proof that is completely false. By refusing to call them diapers, people only play into and perpetuate that stigma.

My advice, don't let the stigma get to you. Do you ever feel embarrased by needing spectacles or glasses, braces or casts, or well you get the idea. And the next time (if ever) someone tries to give you a hard time over "diapers", just know that's all on them. And that person is to be pittied, not be embarrassed by.

@Slomo: Ah, another good topic I've been meaning to comment on.  I have two comments, one in agreement and one where calling an adult diaper a diaper wasn't good...

First, yes, I'd wish the medical community when they work with someone who calls a diaper a diaper (and I've used the "a rose by any other name" analogy).  I had the protection discussion with my current urologist, and I call what I wear cloth diapers, and I believe he did use the diaper word at least once by the end of the discussion, since he knew I was comfortable with it.  However, my last visit I had a reason to get a Cystoscopy and when the doctor left me to get ready he told me to leave my shorts on (while waiting after getting ready for the procedure).  (I was wearing long pants at the time.)  So.... they definitely don't use the "diaper" word normally....

My secondary nocturnal enuresis hit before my parents past.  Dad had more than one medical issue that contributed to incontinence issues. And he never accepted that he needed to go back to being diapered full time to properly manage the issues.  My offer to leave bed pads (and chair pads) were accepted and used.  Offer or suggestion to use diapers were never accepted by dad.  It is obvious to me that he had been traumatized as a child prior to getting out of diapers.  What specifically was done, I don't know.   I am very glad that my parents never shamed, embarrassed, punished, etc. me to get me out of diapers.  Instead I can tell from memories that surfaced after putting myself back in diapers that I was give (strong) positive encouragement when things went right and little if anything was said when it didn't....  And between my siblings and I, I was the hardest to get potty trained.....