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i never got good support nor did they help with anything nor any action was ever taken to help me so i still wake up in a soaked bed multible times a week. so my message to parents is please help your kid! and i seriously wish i had better parents! (advice for me is welcome)

@Dandelion Apologies for the delayed response. I have limits on how much time I can spend on this.... Before it started, I had 10 occurrences between my 7th and 13th birthday, and as a teenager there were two times (packing for a retreat and packing to go off to college) where the thought crossed my mind "What if I wet the bed?", as I never understood why on those 10 times. Later as an adult my second water bed taught me I was vulnerable to certain types of sudden temperature changes causing an urge in my sleep (that went unrecognized), so the main initial thoughts were something was wrong as I hit three times the first night and twice each night the rest of the first week. Called the doctor after the first or second night, but he wasn't concerned based on my past history. However I knew something had changed -- during the previous events it only would happen once in a given night... When it continued after getting off the medications, I noticed a short while later that how I "sensed" things had shifted for the second time that I noticed in my life. (Up until Covid-19, I haven't heard doctors concerned about how a person "senses" things - touch, smell, pain, etc. I've known since elementary school I was different from "normal" in this area.) And that change switch what was occasional nocturia into occasional nocturnal enuresis..... I spent the next year and a half researching information available at the local university hospital library trying to find more - but basically only finding information on (a) with women who I felt had small bladder capacities, and studies of youth (higher percent boys) trying to overcome the problem I was now having... And didn't find a solution that worked.... It did wake up the young boy in me.... And I did find the "little boy" in me never learned to dislike diapers. The "big boy" in me wants out of them, but doesn't know how.... The adult / engineer in me understand my control system and bladder is screwed up... and at this point accepts what is, Now, I've added the "fun" of early onset BPH to the mix. My maximum functional bladder capacity is reduced, and if I stay properly hydrated and get a good night's sleep, I'm going to have a wet diaper in the morning.... And I've accepted that.... Yes there are psychological items that go with that.... Best wishes on dealing with your issues.

Yeah. When life gives you lemons you learn to like lemonade. And when life gives you incontinence issues you learn to like diapers. I've also never hidden I was abdl before I became incontinent. In a way that made things worse for me at first. I sort of felt like I was making up the excuse to wear diapers 24/7. Eventually I realized I loved wearing diapers AND legitimately needed them too. So embracing diapers was the best thing I've ever done.

I think that enjoying incontinence is better than suffering from it.

Our sponsor has a next-gen diaper coming out this week, the new BeDry briefs. 7500ml capacity and odor control at less than $2 a diaper! I ordered some to try. Here's the link if you want to as well: https://incontroldiapers.com/incontrol-bedry-premium-incontinence-briefs/?utm_source=incontsite&utm_medium=banner&utm_campaign=Launch&utm_id=BeDry

I hope you all have a lovely Christmas, what ever you are doing A clean one, as well. I can't wait to hear all about it (what you all got up to, I mean). I may do a thread in the new year (or someone else can) where we can all share what gifts we got etc

CrochetGirl, I think you already have found the solution to living with bowel incontinence - prior planning and preparation. Regrettably, it takes good planning and preparation - and that requires a significant amount of time, as you already have learned. Unfortunately, we tend to lose spontaneity. You are impressively well organized and I agree with everything you are doing. Like you, I have a formal daily bowel program. I have neurogenic bowel due to an old accident and am seen by a SCI Rehab clinic in addition to gastroenterologists, etc. Unlike you, I have very few accidents as I self-administer old fashioned enemas every morning. These are traditional soapsuds or saline enemas from a hanging rubber enema bag, not the chemical Fleets enemas. I will emphasize that an empty bowel cannot have an accident. Once done I can (almost) forget about bowel problems until the following morning. I would rather do this at home than risk a bowel accident in public. I also will note that this is by prescription by my SCI docs and with the approval of my gastroenterologists. Be good to yourself. By that I mean consciously managing your emotional health. Perhaps half the battle to manage incontinence is emotional. Incontinence (and particularly bowel incontinence) causes stress and the stress can increase the incontinence. It is a vicious cycle. Give yourself a break, ie., pamper yourself with something relaxing or enjoyable. It does get better. With time we adapt better to the necessities of living with bowel incontinence. Many things just become "normal" like my diapers just becoming my underwear - not a big deal. Please continue to talk with us. Just talking can be helpful. I am sure you will hear from others here with similar issues. Best wishes, --John

I have found that the store brand at Cabelas that are relaxed fit work really well over my diapers. https://www.cabelas.com/shop/en/redhead-8-pocket-hiker-shorts-for-men

Hello. We are Archer and Lucy. We are both incontinent. We both served in the military but have different journeys to our IC. Mine if from my military service and hers is from a broken pelvis from child birth. It’s been a wild coincidence of paired disability but we live regular adult lives with now 4 kids. we are here to help.

It amazes me how incredibly diverse and differently shaped everyone's bodies are. A diaper that's a guaranteed fail for one person will be a guarantee win for the next person. Though unfortunately for anyone starting out that means a LOT of trial and error finding the right diaper.

I just hope they aren't using store bought diapers. That stuff should never be normal.

Does community college while living at my own apartment count? That was also decades ago, and about 1-2 years after I became incontinent. I was still trying to figure out what diapers actually worked, and back then there weren't many options. So I was predominantly using Attends 10 with wasitbands, but had urge incontinence and would flood my diapers. All too often I'd be sitting down in class and would leak. If it wasn't too bad I'd just stay seated till most everyone had left. Embarrassment aside, a few professors expressed sympathy, and everyone else didn't notice or didn't care. I'd then carry my bag to cover up as much as I could. I also kept a spare diaper in my bag if changing was needed, or a beeline home was a better option. And this was also when I figured out black pants were always needed. At some point I started adding a booster pad too. At first it was a maxipad, but then I found baby diapers worked better and cheaper. Leaks still happened at times, but not as bad. They were always just delt with as best as I could. Unfortunately, diaper covers worn over disposables weren't even a thing back then. Neither were leak guards, sap, or any of the major improvements we now have. So as one can imagine I kept myself at a social distance from others, and didn't attempt to make any new friends.

O i always called them Diapers and you are right about it being clear on your needs .. but after she told me thats what they have to call them i didnt correct them.. the same nurse looked at one of my better drys i had in my bag and commented on how much better they are then what the hospital uses

I think that very few people will hear it, even fewer will recognize the sound, and even fewer will say something to you.

I am very thankful for my diapers. But, it takes a lot of my time to plan, order, and inventory all my incontinence-related supplies. A con is all the heavy diaper trash that needs to be disposed. --John

After you switch to 24/7, your body will start adapting to the added heat retention down there. It took me a few years, but eventually it stopped feeling normally hot and sweaty. Beore that happens, make sure you are completely drying out down there at least once per day. Use rash creams and/or powders after that too. And consider using a diaper that will only last 4-6 hours during 5he day so you'll be changing more often.

For me, elastic waistbands are helpful. They make sure my diaper stays snug without getting too tight, and also help the diaper conform to my body shape. Of which helps contain any smells. They also help by allowing me to pull down the diaper for sitting on the toilet, then pull them back up into place. All without having to redo the tapes. I continuously dribble and can also attest to the standing leak guards helping, a lot. They reduce leaks around my legs, and really help to reduce leaks while sleeping on my side. I feel the premium diapers do have enough capacity and padding to take multiple floodings or all day dribbling for 12 hours (or more), so I'd say they are good where they're at. A few even go way beyond what's needed, but they're clearly for those who want to feel the bulk between their legs. Not really aimed or priced at those who want a diaper that will last through a work day. Wetess indicators are a waste. ANY decent caregiver will be able to spot a diaper that needs changing from across the room. Or smell it. And we certainly don't need them for ourselves. Plus, they only indicate when when the diaper has been first used, not when it's nearing any sort of capacity. So they don't even do any good. Indicators need to be left off. Tapes and plastic backing material could definitely be better and stronger. It's ok enough as is, bu5 just barely. I'd love to see getting rid of second chance tapes AND without needing a too-small tape landing zone. Three tapes per side would also be a big improvement. Though I'm sure all of that would mean more expensive diapers, which almost nobody wants. So that isn't likely to happen. You did overlook colors and prints though. While completely secondary to their function, I see plenty of request for more colors (especially blue or light blue), and non-babyish prints. Personally I like Crinklz though.

Personally, I find more comfort in a diaper that is thicker, or to you point fluffier. While the thin can be more discrete, I often times find that it takes a second for the firmly compressed padding to be ready to absorb everything I’m throwing at it. Fluffier diapers like Northshore MegaMax leave me with no fears of leaks and when dry are honestly quite discrete! cheers

First of all, you're not a freak. You have issues that you are dealing with.

@sjaeger172004 First and most importantly, you are NOT a freak! You are dealing with a messed up lot in life the best you can. Stay in touch with your psychiatrist and other support, and keep after the doctors to get a solution.

Inconinmiss hit the nail on the head. One day I was being examined by three highly qualified urologists who kept insisting that I stop using diapers and use a catheter. I explained to them that I had successfully used five different catheter systems but preferred diapers. I explained that when one has a failure with a catheter system it often is a catastrophic failure with urine on the floor (possibly on your host's expensive oriental rug). With a diaper I usually can hide a failure and that a failure for me is very infrequent. They refused to listen and I left. Plus, consider that I am double incontinent. The bowel incontinence would keep me in a diaper anyway. --John

I normally don't do intros on forums, but this might be the first serious forum I've joined. I've been an AB pretty much my entire life, although I didn't really recognize it until I was a teen. So I am not a newcomer to wearing diapers. That's a good thing. In October I started up a new set of meds, all of which have diarrhea as a side effect. I have a consult with a telenurse every three weeks. The first one went fine, I had had no problems from my meds. The next weekend, I had a weak end. I was standing talking to friend at a gaming convention, when I had a very uncomfortable and uncontrollable wet fart. It was a good thing I was wearing a diaper. Over the next month I had several more accidents, about every week. These ranged from small leaks to fairly large messes. Again I'm glad I'm an AB. This culminated at Thanksgiving dinner, where I again had a wet messy fart. No warning to these. Yay for diapers! I've told the telenurse about this and we've been adjusting both the amount and formulation of my meds. So in the past couple of months I've had a dozen or accidents, ranging from a small leakage to a complete uncontrollable emptying of my bowels. Has any one else had this reaction to the meds they take?

Lol. I wouldn't say I'm dedicated to Crinklz, I just haven't found anything better, let alone similarly functioning at the same price. And when you're urinary incontinent, having a diaper you can trust, for about $110 per month, is hard to beat. What you say is very interesting though. ABU, Bambino, and many others-even megamax and Trest Elite. If it has a tape landing zone, they all have that same general cut and tape placement shortcoming. And every one of them has failed me so far. Always prematurely leaking on me, around the legs, and long before even reaching half their intended absorbency. And wow, have I tried a LOT of different ones. That's why I fall back on Crinklz so much. When you take away all diapers with a landing zone, Crinklz is literally the only Premium diaper with prints on it. Rated at 5000ml ISO. And only one of a few that doesn't cost $200-300 for a month's supply (at 2 per day). And I have been looking for a "backup" diaper for a while now. Guess I'll have to try them and see if they work for me or not. And even if they do fail me, I can add my own tapes to reduce those leaks around my legs and still get my money's worth out of them. So BeDry, be ready for some testing against some higher expectations.

That it's no big deal.

My OAB and level of hydration cause me to suddenly empty a full bladder rather than Brian's "short bursts." The Megamax diaper has extremely tall internal standing leak guards. We tend to associate those with containing bowel incontinence. However, they also keep pee in the main channel of the diaper (over the absorbent mat and away from the leg gathers) until it can be absorbed. As I am double incontinent, this feature is very important to me. Another diaper with very high internal standing leak guards is the BetterDry. It is substantially less expensive than the Megamax. Order it from XP Medical or LL Medico for very good prices. I also wear the Northshore Care Trifecta diaper cover that Brian mentioned. The diaper is made of PUL and is breathable. Although it is a bit more expensive, it lasts for a very long time. --John

@emily1890 I agree with my colleagues! Unfortunately, there are people in this world who think that way, and they are the ones that need a reality check! It's bad enough when you have to use the bathroom, it's bad enough when you are incontinent and you can't hold it, and it's even worse when you have to release and you have somebody that thinks because you can't use the bathroom like everyone else, that there is a problem with you! Anybody who thinks that being able to use a bathroom like everyone else is a problem needs a reality check real fast! There's nothing wrong with you emily, nothing wrong with you at all! The problem is it's people that have this type of attitude: very few people in this world when they're born have any control that I know of, and if you're lucky you'll have control of your body functions from the time your party trained until the time you are well into your 80s maybe your 90s, depending on your situation. Anyone who would think you are the dirtiest smelliest thing alive needs to recheck their own self! Every one of us from the time war born until the time were adult has gone through times like this where we get sick or we have no control over our bladder or our bowels and we make a mistake and we wet or mess ourselves on the floor, or maybe have accident on the seat or anything else when you're sitting down, and sometimes that happens. No one has full continents at all times and no one is expected never to have an accident! Anyone who thinks that because you can't use a bathroom like everyone else that you are the smelly as dirtiest thing alive needs to be slapped repeatedly at high velocity! I'm not a guy that's violent, but I can't stand it when somebody tries to make something worse than it actually is or makes something of something like this, because it's not your fault emily, it's not your fault at all! That you should get right out of your head right now: anyone else who thinks that way needs to have a reality check real fast as I said! There are many times when I have to bite my tongue, but in this case if I had been standing near that I probably would have taken one look at your friend, and then tell her or him that he or she should have more compassion and more empathy for the condition that your friend is dealing with, because it's not funny and it's not something that she can control, and not only that but when you have a friend, you try to understand your friend not try to put them down not try to make fun of them or make light of something like that, because it's embarrassing enough to have accidents, it's embarrassing enough that you have to admit that your incontinent, and it's equally embarrassing to have to figure out how to deal with it by using whatever solution that you use to deal with it. If you choose to wear diapers, then that's your choice, and regardless of how many friends I will have, if someone did that to me, they would end up getting one heck of a stare for me, because the ones that I tell about my incontinence are ones that I trust, not ones that I would think that would take that and make a huge deal out of it or make you feel lower than the lowest thing on Earth! Everybody has to use the bathroom my dear, everybody does! Whoever the heck is telling you all of this needs to be put in your position in the roles reversed, then he or she Would understand what it's like to have a mess in their pants and I'm having to deal with the extreme embarrassment that comes along with it. I've had friends for many years that are incontinent, and I've dealt with people that are incontinent, and the first thing that you wanna do is be supportive helpful and understanding, even if the person is dealing with a lot on their minds, even if it does smell a little bad, even if it does take a little bit longer to clean up, that's what you do, because if you're a good friend you overlook it and you know the person has no control or you have dealt with it in the past and it's not a big deal. I've lived here for 28 going on 29 years next year. For those 29 years I've lived next door to an awesome guy who is in a wheelchair who is Black. I don't look on his race any different than I would look on anyone else, because he's my friend regardless of what color his skin is, and anyone who would pick on him because of his skin color or make light of that and make a big deal out of it I would probably roast right in front of the person so they would feel like they were a pile of pee in the middle of a sponge! The same thing can be said of anyone who would make fun of you because you have to use the bathroom. My friend also has called me in the middle of the night i'd say about between 12 and 3 in the morning, asking me to help him clean up a mess. I will go over there and I will help him do it, it might be a little bit disgusting and it might be a little bit time consuming, but if I can help him, and I have the necessary equipment and the time, I will go right over there and I won't even bat an eyelash, even if he made a mess all over the floor, that's the least of the worry, because you can always clean up a mess on the floor, you can always clean up a mess anywhere, but the emotional trauma from this type of a response is real it's terrible and it hurts really bad! I'm very sorry to hear that there is someone who you were with that was that insensitive so they didn't even give $0.02 about your feelings and your emotional well being! If you are two years old, and you are a baby still, you would have an accident or you would have used your diaper, and someone would have changed it, and they wouldn't even have blinked an eyelash, because that's what babies do they use their diapers. You are an adult, and as an adult even if you are incontinent you are accorded the same rights responsibilities feelings and you should be treated with respect by everyone, and if they disrespect you, then they if they're your friends aren't very good friends are they? I'm not sure exactly what your companion that day was thinking in his or her head but this is the worst kind of thing you can do to a friend! Do you have a friendship that is built on trust love companionship and the ability to tell them anything, and when you have a friend that's that strong, or a friendship that lasts the years, you learn to deal with many things you learn to accept many issues and you learn how to deal with idiots who put your friendship at risk! If this gentleman or lady was with you and did this to you I would seriously consider giving them the what for! One of these days that friend so curled will end up being in the same situation you are my friend and you will have the luxury of being able to tell them that you told them so once they get old enough to need diapers. The Bigger person is in this situation is the one who accepts you as a friend regardless of what happens! I don't care whether you ended up getting sick, I don't care if you didn't feel well, I didn't care if you had a bad day and you needed help, friend is there to do it for you and do it when you can't! A friend is always there regardless of what happens, and friendships always form overtime when you learn to trust people's instincts you learn to trust the person and you know that person very well. It is my hope that this individual learns a valuable lesson! And that lesson is do not pick on someone else who is incontinent or has no control over their ladder or bowels, because some day some day this individual will learn the lesson that you know you learned yourself, about being incontinent and how inconvenient it can be, how embarrassing it can be, and in this case I wouldn't blame you if you felt like the lowest thing on the planet, because of the person who was treating you this way. If I was there that day I would give you one hell of a hug and I would keep on hugging you until you felt better. When you have someone that is with you rip you down as far as that and you feel that bad, something needs to change, and I would definitely consider if this is a friend of yours not to be a friend with that person for a long time unless and until that person gives you a heartfelt apology from the bottom of their heart, and promises that they will never ever ever do that again! Doing what this person did is the lowest possible thing that a person can do, it's bad enough that you have to deal with what you deal with, but to have your emotional stability rocked to your core so you feel the way that you're seeing that you felt that day is unacceptable and is just about as bad as a two year old having a temperate tantrum over a cookie! Or having someone tell you know when you go flying off the handle! Sometimes you can't have what you want when you want it, sometimes things don't happen the way you want it to happen, and you have to deal with it, and I'm sure you understand that very well! People who treat others with this much insensitivity need a kick in the booty, And may that person never be in the position you were, when you had to go to the bathroom and you had to use your diaper, and if they had to do the same thing, I wouldn't be the one laughing at them, because I am more of a man not to do that. My momma taught me to treat ladies with respect, and that's exactly the way you would be treated! I hope your friend never has to be in that position, because then somebody like you could then turn the tables on them, even though that may not be the most appropriate response, sometimes you feel like just slapping them and saying You idiot ha ha ha and just laughing your head off, but obviously what happened to you is no laughing matter: the thing is people that act like that and make a big deal of you wearing and messing a diaper or peeing a diaper, well they haven't had to deal with what we deal with! Having to go to the bathroom, having to get up, having to run as hard as you can to try to get there, and then sometimes you make it, sometimes you don't, and sometimes you don't even have enough control to be able to get up out of the chair to be able to walk across the room! That's happened to me a few times. I send you a lot of hugs, and a lot of empathy and understanding! People who do that really burn my candle at both ends of the wick! If they have time to pick on you and make such a big deal out of what's going on, then they have the time to think twice about what they're going to do the next time, and God forbid your friend end up being in your position Someday, because you understand it, maybe that person does not, but there's one thing I will not do And that is to pick on anyone who is incontinent or unable to make it to the bathroom, that's just awful terrible and unacceptable! Brian

Most any pants or shorts, 1 size larger than normal, will accommodate diapers fairly well. Also, I found anything with extra creases or pockets (like pleated pants) visually break up the area around your crotch, which helps hide a diaper quite nicely. One other thing that helps hide a diaper is a good diaper cover. Leaks are a dead give away, so containing them before it becomes outwardly noticable is a must. I personally prefer Gary Activewear PUL pants. I wear them inside out, so the nylon layer is on the inside. This allows the cover to absorb some of a leak, while also helping me to notice it a little faster. PUL pants also muffle diaper crinkling too, furthering one's stealth.

in some places its law https://www.cbsnews.com/minnesota/news/adult-changing-tables-are-now-minnesota-law-in-all-new-public-restrooms/ i like this idea and would like to see them in family restrooms, i change myself so its not something i would use but for those that do need this it would be great

Yeah, I have a 2-day hospital go bag I brought with me. And also had my wife bring me a full bag of crinklz. When she showed up with the new bag the nurse went off her rocker and declared them banned and put away in a storage cabinet. That's when she went to that horrible vacuum collection system (periwiz). It leaked 2x the first evening, 4x the next day, and 1 more the next morning. I could feel a rash setting in so that's when I said screw the nurse and went back to my diapers this morning. Haven't seen her since then, but don't care.

To start with, I put myself back in diapers when secondary nocturnal enuresis kicked in during a major illness. At the time, the doctor wasn't that concerned (due to the acute start up), but I "felt" something had changed. Once I was off the medication for the illness, I was left with occasional nocturnal enuresis that replaced occasional noctueria... At first I view the situation as short term and for the next year and a half tried to get the issue resolved, including spending time doing research in the local university's medical library. Let's just say I can sleep through the night time potty training alarms and wear out the batteries..... Eventually, I accepted that this wasn't going away. I also recognize that a part of me is a DL.... However if you had mentioned any of this prior to the start up of secondary nocturnal enuresis I would have given you a quizzical look and not known what you were talking about. A few years back, early onset BPH bit day time control, and now I wear all the time. I try to not use the diapers during the day, but at this point they are typically slightly damp by evening. I've accepted the need, and just get on with life. I've made a point of not keeping the diapers from stopping me from doing what I want to do.-

The stigma is still there, but it has improved over the years. I think the ageing baby-boomers are accepting the help of absorbent products more proudly than past generations.

Hi and welcome. I also became incontinent while in the military. If you don't mind my asking, what has it been like raising 4 kids while also dealing with incontinence? How was potty training handled? And did you have any other hurdles or problems because of your incontinence?

Same for thick as well. Thin always means it will have more sap (super absorbent polymer). And too much sap to padding means it will take much longer for the diaper to absorb pee, and also be much more likely to leak. Thin diapers are also more expensive than thick diapers too. Think about it, every time you change a thin diaper you're paying for an new waterproof shell, tapes, elastics, etc. But go with thick and every minute past changing a thin one you're only paying for the added padding. On a per day basis, the cost of a thick diaper always comes out cheaper. Then there's function too. A diaper's entire purpose is to prevent embarrassing leaks. Thin fails at this way too often, and thick excells at not leaking. Going with a thick diaper is what's called a no-brainer. Especially when you consider this "a thick diaper that has done its job is way less noticeable than a thin one that has leaked".

Water. It's the most important thing you can drink to help with incontinence. Seems counter intuitive, but it can't be overstated. Dehydrating yourself so you won't have to go as often does more damage to your body overall. AND it makes your pee smell much worse while also causing more rashes. Just don't do it. Cranberry juice (not the juice mix) is also really good for maintaining urinary health. It's even been shown to cure minor UTIs. As for bowel incontinence (and IBS), that's probably going to vary from person to person. Though generally, vegetables are usually quite helpful in reducing symptoms and making you more regular.

I just had an interesting conversation with a new urologist, so thought I'd share. For those who don't know, I previously had a severe urinary blockage (neurogenic dyssynergia), coupled with sever urge incontinence. And yes, it was painful and the complications from it were even a little deadly. A whopping 16 surgeries later and now I'm functionally incontinent, with dripping all the time. Except recently I've sometimes been retaining urine in my bladder. Given my history I figured it would be best to look into why that's happening. So my pcm referred me to a new urologist. I'm a disabled veteran, and get my primary care at a Navy base hospital, and my urologist referral also ended up being on base too. And he is an active duty Captain. So I started him off with a brief history, where I should be with my functional incontinence, and what's been going on. And as expected he ordered a cystoscopy for a later date so we can figure out what's changed. But then he starts asking me how I've been dealing with all my problems, sex life, and managing my incontinence! Like, no other specialist has EVER cared enough to even ask this stuff.... On the topic of managing my incontinence we ended up talking about how difficult it was for me when I first started wearing depends 24/7 (In the 90's). And how bad they were with leaks. How even now the only thing dependable with Depends is they absolutely will leak. But I've since found much, much better online that is also cheaper. Intreagued he asked me what I use now, and I told him Betterdry (just to keep it simple, even though I actually use Crinklz). That yes they cost 3x as much, but they also last 6x as long. They don't leak, have better acquisition and therefore feel dryer for longer, need changing much less often, and therefore cost less on a cost-per-day basis. And he was really happy to hear all that. I just wish I also told him about LLMedical, which sells them with a military/veterans discount. Lol, or maybe this website too.

Thanks for the sympathy. It didn't happen all that often, maybe like once a week or two. And thankfully my time in the US Marines instilled me with a lot of self confidence that helped me deal with it. All that hardship is one of the reasone why I like being here to try and help others. It gives me meaning to know that I didn't go though it all for nothing. That others can benefit from it all.

I've watched the abdl forums for a looooonnnnggg time. And can say for certain they do not undermine what we are trying to achieve. At least the vast majority don't. And when some abdl does crop up in a bad way they are shot right back down. Policed by their own community. In fact, I'd say the 30-40% of abdls who also have a diaper fetish are hidden so far in the closet they might as well be top secret about it. And the rest just want the idea of adults wearing a diaper (regardless of a physical OR psychological need) to be more socially acceptable. No forced exposure in public, except in places where it's already ok to be less dressed (like a locker room or at the beach). They just want the ability to be in public, with a diaper on, and not have to feel embarrased or be in fear of being found out. Pretty much like the rest of us.

I'm like that too. I am on a warpath to make diapers feel normal. I try to fight so hard to use the word "Diaper" instead of Briefs. The word "brief" makes it feel like I should be ashamed for wearing them. It's why I am not ashamed to say I wear diapers and I wear diapers to cope my Incontinence. The problem I see is that in society and the Medical community they want to hide the notion of people who have incontinence issues and wear diapers. It's kind of funny that society is okay with babies wearing diapers but when it comes to a child, teen, adult, elderly or disabled. They seem to change the name and not stick to reality and stick to facts. For me, I still call it a diaper no matter what society and the medical community calls it. I call it a diaper regardless and I see it for what it is. Calling it something else imply's I need to hide or feel ashamed. It's why I am not afraid, ashamed or humiliated for wearing a diaper. I never use the term that the medical community wants to shove down our faces. It's why I am one of those who hate the word "brief" and when someone in the medical community says that, it makes me feel shameful and makes me think that their is something wrong. I feel that there isn't anything wrong and we shouldn't encourage shame in people who need diapers. I wear diapers and I know I am not ashamed about that. To me, a Diaper is what helps me get by in life.

I think these calculation are a nice reference point - but you can see that yourself. If you don't take any urine-discoloring drugs now, you can simply look at the color of your urine. Almost transparent: Too much liquid Light yellow: enough liquid Dark yellow: too little liquit

Oh wow. I can't believe they made you keep taking it after you threw up the first time. Let alone after so many repeats. Doctors are supposed to know they can use multiple types of prep solution. Mine was called Clenpiq, it was a small 6-8oz bottle I drank half of in one gulp, then again 4 hours later in another gulp. I did almost throw that stuff up, and I'm sure if it was mixed with the electrolyte water like yours was I probably would have. Why they can't make it tast less awful I have no idea. But mine didn't tast like it was supposed to either, not even close. My last one 10 years ago had me use mirlax and dulcolax. No bad taste, and no inclination of throwing up. Same end result. And wow 27 megamax diapers? That's way more than I would have guessed could have been needed. Then again you did effectively go through the prep twice in a row. At least you had the supplies and didn't have to result to those medical grade pullups. I don't even want to imagine that.....

Not Trest, but I did try Megamax. And was kind of disappointed with them. They leaked on me before they even came close to half full, right at the front of my legs. Not a surprise though, Megamax has their lower tapes shifted up towards the middle of the back wings. Which means I will never be able to get a snug fit around my legs with them. Really with any diaper that uses a tape landing zone, and "no lower tapes". Which Trest is even more extreme with their tape placement, so I have no interest in trying them.

Well, it turns out taking the second dose of prep right before trying to go to bed is a bad idea. I found out afterwards there was still a bunch of poop left in part of my intestines. They didn't see anything worth noting, but because they couldn't see everything they want me back in a year for a redo. When I saw the doctor in recovery he even mentioned it would have been better if I took the second dose when I woke up. Thanks doc, maybe then you should change those instructions I was given. Uuugh. Other than that, recovery was easy and quick. I was in and out in under 3 hours. Then came the gas. Little know fact. During the procedure they use nitrogen gas to literally blow your intestines up like a balloon. It's needed so they can see everything good. But that can be painful to some hence why they knock everyone out. They do deflate you before you wake up, but still, there's always some left for you to pass thereafter. I didn't have it bad at all my first colonoscopy, but this one was much worse. Maybe because there was still poop in me, I don't know. The gas moving through me felt like massive pressure at points, which caused me enough pain to double over at times. Eventually it did pass though, and all returned to normal.

An indwelling catheter is a closed system and to reduce or not be subject to UTI's you always have to keep that in mind. I wear the collection bag for as long as possible because changing the bag can introduce bacteria. I clamp the catheter before removing the collection bag and then attach the new one. I don't use a night bag because that means every morning you need to change bags. I always wear a 1000ml bag which is sufficient for overnight use. There are several bags that size which are undetectable even wearing jeans and the bag is almost at capacity. Also when I drain the bag I leave enough urine to keep air out. The sphincter acts in the same way. The bag is just a bladder outside of your body.

Interesting how long Slomo and Iken are able to last without a change. I stay well hydrated and am a heavy wetter. I usually need to change at about 6 hours and rarely risk going longer than 7 ½ hours. However, on long car trips if I "diaper heavy" I usually can last for 12 hours. Otherwise my changing habits are similar to Scarth. --John

Also, a minor history lesson. The UK and Europe originally had naps or sanitary napkins used by women for their periods. They adapted those napkins into nappies for babies. Or what we now refer to as reusable cloth. The inventor of what we consider the modern disposable first called them boaters but quickly adapted the word diaper. So a nappy is reusable cloth, and a diaper is disposable plastic. But yeah, they get incorrectly mixed up and used interchangeably by a lot of people.

Agreed 100%. Being able to admit to others you need diapers, and being able to openly talk about it is a huge step forward. Just as much as admitting it to yourself. I'd also add that anyone who refuses to use the word Diaper are feeding into the stigma that diapers should be avoided at all costs, they are not for adults, somehow wrong and giving up, you name it. By simply mentioning them by the correct name we are fo4cing that stigma to be dispelled.

Yep. That is a tough one. The inconvenience of it can be completely deflating sometimes. Sorry for your crumby day😒 For me it's when I am "in the zone" getting something done that i'm really focused on, and I can't tell that I am wetting myself until I am nearly leaking. Then having to stop and change is such a distraction and can ruin my motivation. Finding those windows of times where I feel both healthy, and motivated seem like they are few, so things like changing are energy and time spent that I wish I could be spending on other things. I feel ya.

Hello, thank you for your messages. I feel the same. I no longer have any control over my bladder but the urge to urinate every 10 minutes has disappeared, it has been a real relief. Diapers … at the time I did not want to hear about it. Psychologically it was difficult but I learned to accept it. a lot of people think that I took the easy way out and that I could fight my incontinence a little more. in a sense, they may be right because without results, I lost motivation. I know this is not a solution to my problem but I cannot stay hidden at home. I need to wear and I have to wear diapers and finally with a little experience, I manage to live my daily life much better.

I was at first, and with those old 1990s depends, I know for a fact people could hear them crinkling. Modern diapers a waaaay quieter. Though in a very quiet setting its possible someone could still hear them. Most anywhere else, forget it. People are so caught up in their own world they will not notice. Ever hear of the "gorilla test". Look it up on YouTube. Like Brian, I too recommend PUL pants for mitigating the rest of that crinkling sound. Either Gary Activewear, or Northshore Trifectas. They are great at containing leaks (even with disposable diapers), help contain any smells, and do a great job muffling any sound. Also, it gets easier with time. At some point you'll come to realize and fully internalize that diapers are not illegal, immoral, or even socially bad. They are necessary though, and anyone who has a problem with you wearing a diaper shouldn't be feared, they should be pittied. For it's their problem not yours. And once you get to that point you'll also stop caring even if they do notice.

Not just believable. Scientifically proven. Too much stress is well known to cause all kinds of problems, physical and mental.