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even if just a tiny bit, I wake up for it. I could wake up 4/5 times a night, not because I need changing, just because I need to go in my diaper. how can I stop this and only wake up when my diaper needs changing. it's very disturbing for me, especially for someone who fills them like they are going out of fashion

Emily, it may just take time. That's what did it for me. Your mind needs time to adjust to the new situation where peeing in your diaper is "ok." Slomo has a good point that you may be fearful of leaking - I was. I had to beef up my nighttime diaper ensemble, including better diaper, good booster pad, and two (not one) pairs of PUL pants. One pair is larger and fits my thighs lower than the first pair of plastic pants in order to catch any bad leaks. Fortunately, that rarely happens. Also, I added a washable absorbent pad, "just in case." Good luck. --John

It may be your subconscious holding you back. Can you fully say you trust your diaper to not leak at night, in any position, and even flooding the diaper from a full bladder? If no, then you need better diapers. I used to have that problem too. Turns out it was the diaper I was using. It took a while after switching to betterdry/crinklz, but eventually I was able to get a full night's rest and wake up in a wet diaper. Part of the key is when you wake up, don't move or make any adjustments. Pee exactly as you are, then try to fall back asleep without moving too. Eventually your subconscious will get the message you don't have to move, and your diaper will keep you protected, so there's no need to wake up.

Again thank you for your advice. I had adopted practically the same method which helped me to meet a very nice and attentive woman. Unfortunately, there was no follow-up, but it allowed me to overcome my fear. To tell the truth, I'm a little lost and I don't know what I want. Every day, I manage my daily life in relation to my incontinence, I am no longer able to control my bladder and diapers have become a necessity. I feel embarrassed to impose my incontinence on someone. I don't know if I will be able to bear the gaze of a person compared to me. This is a new situation for me and I think it will take me time to overcome the obstacles.