Slomo

Most any good quality diaper cover should protect against fecal leaks, I personally prefer the Gary activewear PUL cover as it also help muffle and crinkling from my diaper.

Though outright stopping any odor is always going to be a challenge for any diaper cover. Mostly because of the concave shape to the small or our back, but also because even just moving around or sitting down will let air (and odors) escape.
For real good odor control I've seen the best approach is an internal deodorant taken daily. Anything containing chlorophylln copper (such as Nullo) or bismuth subgallate (such as Devrom) should work good for that.

Thankfully I don't have to deal with bowell accidents all too often, so I haven tried using them myself. But from what I've seen it's supposed to be worth it if you have regular occurances.

Most any good quality diaper cover should protect against fecal leaks, I personally prefer the Gary activewear PUL cover as it also help muffle and crinkling from my diaper. Though outright stopping any odor is always going to be a challenge for any diaper cover. Mostly because of the concave shape to the small or our back, but also because even just moving around or sitting down will let air (and odors) escape.

For real good odor control I've seen the best approach is an internal deodorant taken daily. Anything containing chlorophylln copper (such as Nullo) or bismuth subgallate (such as Devrom) should work good for that. Thankfully I don't have to deal with bowell accidents all too often, so I haven tried using them myself. But from what I've seen it's supposed to be worth it if you have normal occurances.

2 hours ago, Brian said:

@John Davis

Usually for me, urine order isn't a problem, unless of course I have oversaturated my diapers, or for some reason I stay in the same diaper with the same cover for many hours. if you're in a diaper for 6 to 8 hours, and you keep on using it, the likelihood of urine odor being detected goes up. What I've learned from experience is that you can use powder all over the place, but you have to be careful Because when you use powder, that particular tau will will cake and cause a whole bunch of problems for your skin, so if you end up with wetness in the area of what you will be cleaning up will be Clods of powder, And that would be a mess to clean up, So you'd have to lightly use the powder and then rub it in really well, lest you end up with a bunch of mess that you have to clean up when you end up wiping down.

Secondarily, when you end up with need to change, and you keep using the diaper, likelihood goes up that it begins to smell, when you take off a diaper and you're not aware of it, I can tell you that if you do not have enough liquid in your system or enough hydration, the urine smell can be overpowering, and can smell like very very very pungent or strong ammonia. luckily ammonia doesn't bother me too much, but if I were to get a bottle of ammonia and open it up I would be allergic to that.

Yes, I have my diaper covers, which are really awesome, and they help me keep the smell and mess to a minimum as much as possible. I can't say enough that plastic pants are necessary, regardless of what diaper you wear, because it keeps everything within the diaper or within the plastic pants, and it also keeps the diaper in position, just like a onesie would if somebody was wearing one. The only problem is when you take a onesie offer you take the pants off, Up having it sad because you're trying to hold up something close to you, and when the diaper can expand it drops when you try to take it off, and I mean take off the onesie the diaper drops.

This is a normal part of wearing diapers, the more you put in the diaper, the lower droops, but that's why you have to have good diapers, cause if you don't have good diapers you end up with a humongous leak Then you end up with a severe case of diaper rash and then it'll be a pain in the neck to clean up, and it can be very very painful If you let the rash go too long, not even the proper spray cleaner will help you, because that would even hurt you even more.

It's always a good idea however not to sit in a wet diaper for two too long, I can understand that people might wanna sit in a wet diaper, and I support that, but be careful that you're not sitting in a diaper too long, because the urine and the ammonia can cause issues And it also causes a problem because what is touching you needs to be eliminated.

Brian

I can also attest to this. IF you are not well hydrated then you absolutely can (and probably will) smell bad after just 8 hours. Even when using a diaper that can last double.  Stay well hydrated* and you likely won't start smelling anything untill 12+ hours in that same diaper.

* The World Heath Organization states all adults should start with drinking 2 liters of water per day. AND increasing that amount based on weight, activity level and weather conditions.

Of note: Water poisoning by over hydrating is also a thing. Though you'd have to drink 2+ liters of it in under an hour. Or something like 24 liters in one day. Which most normal people couldn't ever come close to.

I'd be a little surprised to see if ANY person uses specifically a diaper bag (ie, made for parents to carry a babys supplies) as their own diaper bag. I mean, to each their own but that would be a daring advertisement you're diapered. 

Take a look at my post about "no lower tapes" in this thread here:https://incont.org/index.php?/topic/10-what-is-your-favorite-diaper-color-and-what-is-your-favorite-diaper/#comment-253

Basically, if this type of diaper already works for you, then you can expect the same greatness. If it doesn't, then those ones won't either. Of course, there are minor variations. So some brands might work slightly more or less better, depending on your own body shape, type of incontinence you have, overall absorption, etc, etc.

I use a pretty standard hypo allergenic mattress cover, which is also waterproof. It's polyurethane laminate, and breathable. You can get one at wallmart or most any mattress store for around $40-50, and typically lasts me about 7-9 years.

9 hours ago, AUG168 said:

That's probably in my future. Did you regain continence?

 No. The meds would have never worked on me because at 30-40 years old I didn't have an enlarged prostrate. I was only on them because of inept urologists who didn't want to figure out my underlying issue. Instead they just put me one pill after another to "see if it helps". 

My problem was neurological, likely from an L5-S1 spinal injury. When I finally convinced my urologist to just remove my malfunctioning muscle, it took a half-dozen sphincterotomy surgeries to do so. Except the repeat surgeries caused a large stricture part way in my prostrate. So I had a prostrate blockage, just not from an enlarged prostrate. So of course it had to be removed too (along with part of my urethra).

On the plus side, I won't have to worry about prostrate cancer or bph in a other 15-20 years.

I generally don't mention my bowell issues to others either. Though I have always been up front about it with my doctor- when it was relavent to do so.

On 4/8/2023 at 12:24 PM, John Davis said:

I am among several here who are fecal incontinent.  Those here are the "survivors" - those who have managed to cope with that form of incontinence.  Unfortunately, many have not and tend to isolate themselves from society and avoiding all social contact.

A few years back I was shocked to read a 2016 JAMA article that reported a survey of patients hospitalized with serious conditions who listed fecal incontinence as being a state worse than, or equal to, death.😱  Now, that was not a survey of the general public, but it does reflect the very negative attitutes toward bowel incontinence held by many.  Many newly FI are reported in medical studies to have had suicidal ideations.  It is unclear how many attempted suicide.

For myself, I admit that I had very negative views before actually becoming FI and learning to manage it somewhat effectively.

How do you think the public views fecal incontinence? For that matter, how does your family and relations view FI?

--John

You have to realize that study centered around older people who were not very mobile and were forced to use crappy medical grade diapers, or even just bed pads. They were completely new to this problem too, and hadn't figured out what works or not either. If I suddenltly had to live under those conditions I'd probably prefer death too.

And I do suffer from IBS-D. Combined with some previously removed hemorrhoids and a bleeding anal fissure, I can barely tell the difference from gas and liquid. I've mostly learned how to cope with it and stay on a regular bowel schedule though, so accidents are rare. But they do happen. Yet with using good diapers and a good diaper cover it's not that big of a deal any more.

Not exactly, though I was on Flowmax and calis before (for the usual "see if it works", that didn't) . And I did have a blockage in my prostrate. Had a turp that wasn't enough to open it, so they completely took out my prostrate. 

I stay very well hydrated (2+ liters per day). I also use a premium diaper rated at 5000ml, and a good diaper cover. I can go up to 16 hours in this same diaper before it smells enough for others to notice, or threatens to leak on me. Though I always change before that, I had tested it to the max before. 24 hours, a slight leak, strong enough smell, and a developing rash. Not something I'd recommend for normal, but always good as a test to know how far it will go before failure.

For day to day, I don't carry a diaper or disaster bag with me. That's only because I can trust the diaper I use (Crinklz), combined with my usual diaper cover (Gary activewear PUL). I normally don't need them, but do keep 2 extra diapers in my car. On the rare chance I need to change, I just take it in hand to the nearest restroom and change. In 10+ years of doing this, I've only noticed a few people stare of do a double take. No gawking, snickers, whatever.

I do have an overnight bag though. It is a normal backpack. I keep 2 diapers in it, along with a pair of black pants, and the other usual diaper supplies.

33 minutes ago, John Davis said:

Welcome Aug168.  Many of us have not had much success with medications.

--John

That's an understatement. AUG168, you're in good company here.

I found out early on that wearing my usual diaper for working out or physical rehab kind of works against me. It's thick enough to be extremely noticeable under gym clothes, crinkles too much, and caused chafing. Plus, I'd always want to change out of it afterwards due to sweat and sagging, even if it was hardly used. 

For a while I used depends real fit, but even they would leak on me at times. So now I've been using tranquality atn cloth backed disposables. They are quiet and thin enough, and keep me protected quite well while working out. But they do have problems with stretching loose, clumping, and generally feeling horrible from even just a little bit of sweat. Ok for an hour or so, but I'm more than happy to change out of them afterwards.

On 4/7/2023 at 2:41 PM, rayhill said:

Wow, that's quite a journey! I'm glad you finally got a correct diagnosis. And also WOW - 15 surgeries. That's a lot! How has life been since getting the proper treatment?

15 surgeries was just for my urinary problem. I've had over 2 dozen when including my legs, knees, and nasal problems. But yeah, wow is right. But I can at least say I'm stable, and can still walk short distances.

Yes, insurance companies do require proof of medical need. Though that need can be physical, neurological, or even just mental. So long as it's verified by a doctor, physicial, or psychologist.

32 minutes ago, Zombie_Turtle said:

Diaper resistance is a thing. I definitely had that problem when I needed to start wearing them. I had to have several accidents in public before I would get get over the shame of wearing a diaper.  Isn't that ironic?  Definitely foolish looking at it now.    Not exactly sure why i had such a hard time with it then compared to my attitude now.  Some people never get over it.  I guess one thing that helped me was seeking out help from others in the incontinence community.   

I believe it's part of our human nature to want to fit in. I fell for it too, and also had to deal with that denial and self-shame when I first became incontinent. Because that's what society says we should feel like. It takes realizing society is generalaly wrong about diaper shaming, as well as finding others who can agree with us on that. Like right here.

Does anybody else remember the old Attends 10 with waistbands? Those were the best for fit and conforming. You could readjust those tapes a half-dozen times if needed, and there was no landing zone, just a strong enough shell. And they had 3 tapes per side so the fit was always incredible, and they never sagged.

The fact modern diapers lack those features is what I hate. If we had that combined with modern absorbency and leak guards they would be unbeatable.

Who loves dealing with insurance companies? And have you ever wondered if they will cover the cost of your diapers?

"Most" insurances will automatically deny coverage when first asked. Often stating they are not considered Durable Medical Equipment (DME), since they are not reusable. Except they actually do cover adult diapers, so that means they will provide them to you. And to get them to, you will need to file for an appeal. We'll, most usually do. Some people are just lucky to get them approved on the first try.

In every case I've seen, you first need to go to your doctor, then get a prescription for those diapers. If possible try and get the prescription to say exactly what diapers you want. Though this part will take a little research first. And the easiest way I've seen to do that is to call your insurance provider, and ask for a list of the adult diapers they cover. If they don't have a list, ask to be directed to their supplier for adult diapers. This is going to be a different number for a warehouse distribution facility. Ask them what brands of diapers they carry, and write them all down.  Either way, with list in hand go look up the different kinds they have until you find the best one. Now take that brand to your doctor for getting that prescription.

Of note here: Most insurances will only allow the cheapest and crappiest diapers out there. So expect the "best" might only be something like Tranquality ATN, or Seni (both of which are cloth backed disposables, and are barely functional as a diaper).  Alternatively, a very few companies will secretly allow for a "drop shipment". Meaning they will approve of other non-covered diapers, shipped by someone else (such as LL medical or North Shore Care), as long as that order doesn't exceed a certain price. As example, you can do this with the VA west of the Mississippi, but not VA east. You just need the prescription to say what diaper that is. And don't forget it includes the size too!

Whew, ok. From here your doctor's office should submit the claim on your behalf. If not, get a written script and take it to your insurance carrier in person. Give it two days if your doctor submits it, then proactively call your insurance company. Or ask to talk to someone if delivering it in person. Now, ask them to verify your claim and if they can send you the diapers you wanted (that were named on your script). Many will still try and switch it to a cheaper brand, so this step is necessary to prevent that.

And there you go. Just sit back and wait for those cheap but free diapers to show up at your house.  But also be aware, that shipment is usually not discrete. And now you know why most everyone just buys better diapers on their own- unless cost is a serious concern.

Which brings me to a Health Savings Account (HSA), or a Flexible Savings Account (FSA). You ask your employer to set this up for you, and they take out a certain amount of money from your paycheck- before taxes. They deposit this money into that account, which you can spend on government pre-approved items (there an online list). And yes the government includes adult diapers as an approved, tax free purchase with any HSA/FSA debit card. Note: there is no government requirement for disclosing why you may need diapers. You can get them regardless of that. However, be prepared as you may still need to disclose what you are purchasing to your employer or HSA/FSA banking holder.

After that you can make an online or in-store purchase with that debit card. Make sure you save all receipts too, as the banking card holder or IRS may ask for proof of all purchases on that card. And now you know why most everyone just buys diapers on their own.

10 hours ago, zzyzx said:

Even with two Northshore boosters I can end up leaking at the legs -- probably due in part to a poor seal,

Ah, that may be contributing to your leaking too. Boosters are fine, but you have to make sure they aren't too thick or wide. Because of the leak barriers. They need to rest on you skin, otherwise any wetness can run right past them before it has a chance to be absorbed.

9 hours ago, zzyzx said:

@Slomo: While I can appreciate your position, there are a few parts I don't observe (yet) and may disagree with.

First off, I use cloth diapers.  As such, you WILL feel the wetness after sufficiently drenching the diaper.  I'm fortunate enough that after a few days of (heavy) wetting a heavy diaper at night, and slight use of talc power I can get back to going with out talc powder and as long as I don't try to wear too long, I'm fine.  Ok, I'm wet and not messy when I use the diaper (and on the very rare occasion when messy happens, I make sure to change as soon as possible and clean up real well).  And when I'm on the edge of starting irritation (rash), I'll use talc powder for a couple of days and typically get back to normal.... 

I do use the regular (fuller strength 40% Zinc Oxide if I remember correctly) Desinex (sp?) (or equivalent generic store brand) when I need something more than the talc powder - for a few days before backing off to talc and then back to normal (nothing extra in the diaper)....  I'm also not wet all the time....  I also can wear a wet diaper for longer than I should (and I believe I'm more comfortable than most in wet cloth diapers).  Your mileage will likely very.

I'm not yet to the point of shaving down there....  I can see the point.  For me, my main issue is at night and a morning shower seems to be taking care of the main problem....  I'll agree I now have a light day time component and may be on the edge of needing to start changing before bed where in the past I could get away with waiting till morning.

As to Talc powder, I may have to schedule a trip to Europe or Australia when I finally get close to running out.  : (

Yeah, oops, thanks. I did forget to mention powder! Though talc powder is near impossible to get in the US now, corn starch works just as good.

The best time to apply powder is when you're changing but don't have time to air out first. It draws the moisture out of your skin, allowing you some time after diapering up as if you had aired out. Though I've found it's best to not use a whole lot all at once, or it will cake up into a wet mess that sticks to your skin. Which seems to negate any benefits you may have had at first.

20 hours ago, John Davis said:

That is quite correct "Incont" and you win the prize!👏  The old bedwetting panties, including StayDry, were sold without regard to gender and the term "panty" was used in that sense.  The same was true of the rubber "panties" for both boy and girl bedwetters.

--John

And women or children don't include men either.

Thanks John Davis. And agreed, the only way to get a good handle on rashes is decades of trial and error. Or hopefully from someone else who's been through it. That's what I'm about on here. Trying to make my decades of hardship mean something- by helping others through (or avoid) it too.

23 minutes ago, Iken said:

What I am ashamed of is society not growing up and still using the old, outdated norms about diapers

The irony of that is not lost on me.

Ah, got it. Thanks.