Leaderboard

Congrats on owning it, and double so for being so open about it. I also liked how you said it's better for pee to be out than in. And can attest to that as well. Not being able to stop yourself from going is nothing when compared to the life threatening pain of not being able to release it at all. At first I too also struggled with not wanting to be noticed wearing or even "embracing" diapers. And let me just say, a thin diaper that has leaked is WAY more noticable than a thick one that has done its job. Like you mentioned, you have to use what works best for you. And double so for using what's needed to be confident you won't leak. And yes, going from accepting incontinence to embracing diapers was big and freeing for me too. It really is a game changer for ones mental stability and stress reduction. I personally choose to wear Crinklz (with cute prints) instead of Betterdry (the same diaper but plain white). And while I try to never expose my diapers, in the extremely rare occurance someone sees them (dr appointments, massages, etc), I get far more compliments on the prints than any questions or complaints.

I was once in your same situation. Also with Botox, which made my retention much worse, and required indwelling catheters for a few months till it wore off. At first my pee drained into a bag, but I also wore diapers as I sometimes leaked past the catheter too. Eventually just letting my catheter openly drain directly into my diaper. And I too noticed I would get red and raw around the tip of my penis, with or without mastrubation. (FYI, all guys will normally experience size changes throughout the day, and were usually not even fully aware of it). It turns out my diaper was drying out the catheter when my penis was small, then when I'd get a size increase the skin would stick and rub against the catheter. I mentioned this to my urologist and he recommended applying a small amount of lubricant to the catheter at the tip of my penis. Doing so several times a day, or generally as needed to eliminate the friction rubbing. I found water based lubes didn't last long, and that petroleum jelly really works best. Eventually I ended carrying around some lubricated chap stick with me whenever I went out somewhere. If I needed to reapply some lubricant I could pop in to a restroom and use the chapstick. It worked great when "in a pinch". And yeah, applying extra lubricant before mastrubating made the experience much more enjoyable. Though I'll also add some advice my urologist told me. You need to make sure there is ample room in your urethra for your ejaculation fluid to flow past the catheter. So for example, if you could accommodate a size 20FR catheter, using a size 16FR catheter will leave enough space for accommodating the fluid. But using a 20FR catheter would not. And when you ejaculate, that added fluid will stretch your urethra, and potentially cause tears too. So talk to your urologist and make sure you're not using too big of a catheter. Use enough lube, enough times each day too, and you should be ok.