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Wearing diapers to doctor's appointment


John Davis

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In other forums, wearing diapers to a medical appointment is a much debated  topic, particularly among those who are ABDL.  As most(?) of us here are in diapers 24/7 for medical reasons, I would like to ask whether anyone has ever received adverse comments from a physician or nurse because they were wearing a diaper.  As I usually list incontinence and diaper wearing when I fill out the forms for a new doctor, there is no "shock and awe" if I neeed to disrobe.  I rarely am questioned about it except to ask whether I am managing it well.  Usually the doctor asks whether I am beeing seen by a urologist.  

Surprisingly, my most adverse push-back came from my urologist.  As any urologist should, he regards his mission as hopefully "curing" me and getting me out of diapers. He is a good physician but must feel that I represent his failure as he has not "cured" me and I continue to wear diapers.😱  Seriously though, he has agreed, although reluctantly, that I have sound reasons for continuing to wear diapers.

What about you guys?

--John

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1 hour ago, Incont said:

I wear disposable undergarments or washable "training pants" style underwear to doctor's offices. No one says anything.

@Incont

I wear diapers 24/7 wearing them everywhere. In fact, my doctor was the one who I asked about wearing diapers in 2020, and I had asked for help in 2019 before joining daily diapers. he understood understood exactly why I wanted to do it that way, and has supported me since the beginning of this. All I would have to do was go into my doctor's office and make a good point, and as long as I can make a good argument most of the time he will support it. I love my doctor because my doctor is the type of guy that would say to me to me the word "NO"  if I asked him for something that he didn't think I needed, and he would explain why.

since my doctor is the one who helped me get the diapers and who helped me by adding diagnosis of incontinence to my medical records, he is fully aware of my condition as well as anyone who works in his office, and they are very supportive of that. he would not tell me anything about wearing diapers being bad, he understands that my CP is something that I can't control, and I told him that what I was afraid of was that I would get older, And as I stop doing certain things or I lose mobility, that it would be harder and harder for me to be able to get to the bathroom safely. when I told him that I wanted to wear diapers,, I started in 2019, became a member on daily diapers, got help from there, and then and then after talking to many people, I went back in 2020 and told a doctor I was going 24/7.

5 hours ago, John Davis said:

In other forums, wearing diapers to a medical appointment is a much debated  topic, particularly among those who are ABDL.  As most(?) of us here are in diapers 24/7 for medical reasons, I would like to ask whether anyone has ever received adverse comments from a physician or nurse because they were wearing a diaper.  As I usually list incontinence and diaper wearing when I fill out the forms for a new doctor, there is no "shock and awe" if I neeed to disrobe.  I rarely am questioned about it except to ask whether I am managing it well.  Usually the doctor asks whether I am beeing seen by a urologist.  

Surprisingly, my most adverse push-back came from my urologist.  As any urologist should, he regards his mission as hopefully "curing" me and getting me out of diapers. He is a good physician but must feel that I represent his failure as he has not "cured" me and I continue to wear diapers.😱  Seriously though, he has agreed, although reluctantly, that I have sound reasons for continuing to wear diapers.

What about you guys?

--John

@John Davis

I have never received adverse pushback. Somebody may ask me why, the doctor about diapers in the 1st place, we had a frank discussion. What I like about my doctor is I can bring him anything and we can discuss it. In fact he praised me for having the guts to walk into his office and ask for help using diapers, because it takes a hell of a lot of gutsy says to be able to admit that you need a help and that you have a problem. I told him that wearing diapers would help me in so many ways, and that was getting tired of losing sleep, having accident, not being able to respond fast enough and all of this. Basically he agreed with me, and put the incarnance diagnosis on my records, not only that but he made it so that no one would even doubt that I need diapers, so no one should question me.

As far as your urologist John, I can't understand why urologist would want you to to get out of diapers. sure, he's probably gonna wanna test you to see if there's any problems that can be taken care of by other means, But once the disease the decision has been made, and you wanna go with diapers for example, him wanting to get you out of diapers is a moot point, because that's not what a doctor is supposed to do, a doctor is supposed to work for you, and support you in whatever you want to do. a doctor is however someone who can give you advice and tell you that it might not be a good idea, but at the end of the day you have to make the actual reason and you have to move forward if that's what you want.

Sometimes I think doctors make more money because for example Medicaid for example says that they something done, before they'll approve something. I remember somebody saying that I should go to urologist before I end up getting a proof of diapers, But then I had a long discussion with my doctor and I told him, if you don't know me by now, Then we have a problem, because you are the expert knowing conditions and my medical diagnosis, and you can write it exactly the way it needs to be so that I can get exactly what I need and what I want. I told him that I was sick and tired of having accidents and having problems, and that diapers were way that I could take care of that. He supported me all the way, And I told him that I did not want to have to go to a urologist and have them have to fix something that doesn't need to be fixed! sure I would wet myself or mess myself, but why would somebody want to tell someone who is using a diaper that they don't need it or whatever they say?

I will repeat this: doctors work for you, and they can give you advice and give you support all the way, but in the end you have to make the medical decision that you think is appropriate, and most times when you talk to a doctor and you understand what it is that you're dealing with, you can make an informed decision. A urologist job is to try to help you, but if you want to wear diapers or if you think that what they're doing is not helping you, you have the right to resist or refuse. People need to realize that diapers are not the be all end all, in that they are bad, they are very helpful and can help people leave there worries at the door and live their life to the best they can, Because incontinence doesn't have them, 'cause they have control of their incontinence even if they don't have any bladder or bowel control. Our specialists that help you with stuff like that, and they do have experience with urology, but sometimes yeah they make it so difficult, as well as insurance companies that it's a wonder people don't go crazy.

So yes, wearing diapers to a doctor's appointment is not a bad! I would rather wear them, and have my doctor aware of it, and then if for some reason I have to I have to use the diaper, I have the ability to change it. In fact, I have had a couple nurses ask ask me after a exam if I need to have my diaper changed, and they've offered to help me do it, but I refused when that is offered, because most times I'm all set. But if for some reason I needed it, I'm sure they could help me.

Brian

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Yes I have seen my primary care and a urologist while wearing a diaper. Neither of them have ever said anything negative, but both mentioned that wearing “briefs” should only be a temporary solution for my issues until we can figure out a permanent solution. I’m not sure if it was to make me feel better, or if it was disapproval of me wearing diapers though.

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@John Davis

I've only had one negative reaction out of a doctor, and I wasn't wearing diapers at the time, instead asking for a prescription prior to ordering replacement (cloth) diapers for dealing with the occasional nocturnal enuresis at that time. 

Now, I've added on issues from early on set BPH, so, both my primary care and urologist have seen me in my cloth diapers (and protective pants), and generally no issue...  Last urology appointment included a cystoscopy, and the urologist told me to leave my "shorts" on (while waiting for the procedure) instead of saying diapers.... 

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I've had WAY too many urologists over the decades. Some were absolute quacks who didn't even believe I had any underlying conditions. They literally told me I needed to get out of diapers, and could have done so if I just tried a little harder. Yeah....

I've also had a few that did understand I had urinary issues, yet still thought it was their duty get me out of diapers. Of course, to them that meant catheters, or a stoma (new pee hole in the belly button that also has to be catheterization all the time), or my favorite some medication they though would completely cure me.

All I can say, is if anyone ever ends up with a urogist like that. Fire them immediately. It will be faster and easier if you just start over by looking for a different urologist.

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30 minutes ago, Slomo said:

I've had WAY too many urologists over the decades. Some were absolute quacks who didn't even believe I had any underlying conditions. They literally told me I needed to get out of diapers, and could have done so if I just tried a little harder. Yeah....

I've also had a few that did understand I had urinary issues, yet still thought it was their duty get me out of diapers. Of course, to them that meant catheters, or a stoma (new pee hole in the belly button that also has to be catheterization all the time), or my favorite some medication they though would completely cure me.

All I can say, is if anyone ever ends up with a urogist like that. Fire them immediately. It will be faster and easier if you just start over by looking for a different urologist.

@Slomo

In my mind, it is not the doctor that should be making decisions that say you should be out of diapers. A diaper is a solution to an issue, and the issue is made an issue because of the person that is dealing with it, not because the doctor sees you in a diaper. if you decide that you're going to use a diaper, it is not in the best interest of any urologist to tell you that you shouldn't be. sure, they can say that it is for temporary management of incontinence, But if you are like me, and have cerebral palsy, there's no way that my doctor is going to tell me that he's gonna cure me of cerebral palsy, so there's no discussion of dealing with this. We all know that in my case there is brain damage, and usually CP includes some sort of damage to neurological function. the difference in the severity of the damage would tell how bad you have the CP, but nobody is going to try to treat my CP by trying to cure it.

as such, since you can't cure CP you have to work with the condition that you're dealing with, and treat the symptoms of the condition. A symptom of a condition can be managed, and should be managed appropriately. It is well known that a neurological disease or neurological condition depending on the situation, should be dealt with with the understanding that it is neurological and it can affect your body in different ways. for example, for some reason my right hand will start to shake For no reason sometimes And I don't know how it happens and don't know why it starts to tremor, but it does, and I have to deal with that everyone every once in awhile, while but while there are things I can do to manage that problem when it occurs, I can't stop it from happening again.

If you're incontinent, you may have the ability to be tested to find out how bad it is, or to be able to determine what causes the problem. if you're lucky enough to have the ability to use medicine or medical intervention by taking drugs that help you manage it, then that is one thing this one, if you decide that you want to do something else, that's a different thing, but it should not be up to the doctor to try to get you out of diapers because they don't think it works period to have someone tell you that is almost like saying OK just go all over the floor whenever you feel like it! that is ridiculous And no doctor would tell you to pee on the floor!

additionally I have friends that don't have any bowel or bladder control at all! this is because they don't have working plumbing, so they have no way of being able to control the muscles in their butter or bowels, And it doesn't matter how much a doctor or urologist will tell you that they don't think diapers are a good idea, they are needed, and if you tell someone who has no bowel or bladder control because they don't have control of the muscles that control those functions, regardless of what you say it's not gonna matter. They have to do whatever they do to manage the situation, And if they do that, they have ways of doing it, it might be inconvenient, and embarrassing for certain situations, but those who have to deal with incontinence because of this type of condition, they deal with it the way they deal with it, because they have no other choice.

A urologist should never tell you that you should be out of diapers. Sure, if they have a way to be able to treat your incontinence, that's one thing, But the problem now is, what happens if the drug that they try to treat you with is worse that the condition that they're trying to treat? some people don't like the effects of the drugs they use, some of them just don't like the feeling that a drug causes, or a reaction that happens. some. sometimes I think a diaper is a hell of a lot easier to deal with than to deal with a medical treatment that requires drugs. this is just my opinion, because in my opinion I don't wanna take any drugs that I don't need, an incontinence is something that is normal as far as for people that have cerebral palsy or any neurologic condition, in fact I'm been lucky most of my life that I've been able to control my bladder and bowels, But as I age it becomes harder and harder, because I'm not able to move as fast as I used to.

I agree that anybody that decides that you should be out of diapers or tells you that you shouldn't be wearing them should be fired immediately! when I went to my doctor and I asked him for help, he did not say that diapers were bad, I told them why that I wanted them, told them that I had a neurologic condition, and that CP is known to cause certain subconditions, one of them being incontinence, because people have trouble controlling muscles, so they might not be able to control what's going on. as you age you might not be able to have as much control as you did when you're 25 as you do at 50 or 75, that's usually what happens.

Finally I believe that diapers are my choice and my solution to my problem. A doctor or some sort of professional can actually give me advice, but the thing is that's important is that I can make that decision whether to take the advice or leave it, because it's my doctor, my body, my health and my treatment plan that is being discussed. A professional doctor or nurse or LPN or CNA or whatever they are, their job is to help you, but not to judge You or to tell you that you shouldn't be doing something, unless of course it impacts your health like smoking for example.

Brian

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On 4/26/2023 at 7:31 AM, John Davis said:

Surprisingly, my most adverse push-back came from my urologist. 

My urologist is okay. He will remind me every visit that there may be some surgery that might help, but he understands that I am reluctant and that I would rather leave well-enough alone.

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15 hours ago, Dan said:

My urologist is okay. He will remind me every visit that there may be some surgery that might help, but he understands that I am reluctant and that I would rather leave well-enough alone.

My doctor always reminds me wear my diapers and even does a diaper check on me to make sure I am not developing any rashes because I have sensitive skin. But he understands why I medically need diapers and never pushes for a medical solution. 

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4 hours ago, emily1890 said:

I wear diapers 24/7

 

doctors never really comment, however some patients have randomly commented on the smell but I reckon you're going to get that everywhere, a few people who just find it strange

@emily1890

so do I! I figure that with all the things that I've had to deal with through my through my life, wearing diapers is like the lowest worry on the totem pole. I understand that people may find wearing diaper strange if they're not used to it themselves, but if you're disabled like me and you have friends that have worn diapers, or do wear diapers, to them it's normal and it shouldn't be a problem, but sometimes even in the best of circumstances people will have to use their diapers And sometimes that means they will have to do a bowel movement, and sometimes that happens in places that you don't expect it, because you can't help it!

Since my doctor was the one who helped me with my incontinence, he is fully aware of what is going on and fully supportive. when you end up dealing with as much stress as I have dealt with, you need something to help you with your stress, and part of my problem is I worry about things that I shouldn't worry about, and that can be a problem sometimes. wearing diapers is making it a lot easier for me because I don't have to fight my body and I don't have to worry if I release. I've only had a situation where I've had to use my diaper to its fullest on about four different occasions, but each time it does take time to clean up the mess afterwards. I'm glad that most medical professionals don't have a problem with someone wearing diapers, but it kinda irks me that a urologist would be the one telling you to get help so you don't have to wear diapers, or trying to force you out of diapers. That is not what a urologist is supposed to do! they're supposed to help you, giving you advice is one thing, wanting you out of diapers? That's something that you as a user make the determination of about, and a doctor should not be forcing you. there are people that also wear diapers because they don't have any control at all, so trying to get them out of diapers would be an exercise silliness, and why should anyone wearing diapers want to get out of them If that is what they're using and they're comfortable doing it. the idea is that you want wearing diapers to be as normal for the person wearing them as people where. That's basically what it is: an underwear choice, sometimes not by choice sometimes by choice.

Brian

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On 4/28/2023 at 4:43 AM, emily1890 said:

I wear diapers 24/7

 

doctors never really comment, however some patients have randomly commented on the smell but I reckon you're going to get that everywhere, a few people who just find it strange

So do I, I wear diapers 24/7/365. I have had my Primary care doctor always comment on my diapers and often times dose a diaper check to make sure I am wearing them and not having a diaper rash. For me, being kept in diapers is pretty much normal for me and people around me know I am disabled as well. I make the most of being disabled and being kept in diapers.

 

On 4/28/2023 at 9:04 AM, Brian said:

Since my doctor was the one who helped me with my incontinence, he is fully aware of what is going on and fully supportive. when you end up dealing with as much stress as I have dealt with, you need something to help you with your stress, and part of my problem is I worry about things that I shouldn't worry about, and that can be a problem sometimes. wearing diapers is making it a lot easier for me because I don't have to fight my body and I don't have to worry if I release. I've only had a situation where I've had to use my diaper to its fullest on about four different occasions, but each time it does take time to clean up the mess afterwards. I'm glad that most medical professionals don't have a problem with someone wearing diapers, but it kinda irks me that a urologist would be the one telling you to get help so you don't have to wear diapers, or trying to force you out of diapers. That is not what a urologist is supposed to do! they're supposed to help you, giving you advice is one thing, wanting you out of diapers? That's something that you as a user make the determination of about, and a doctor should not be forcing you. there are people that also wear diapers because they don't have any control at all, so trying to get them out of diapers would be an exercise silliness, and why should anyone wearing diapers want to get out of them If that is what they're using and they're comfortable doing it. the idea is that you want wearing diapers to be as normal for the person wearing them as people where. That's basically what it is: an underwear choice, sometimes not by choice sometimes by choice.

That's like my doctor as well Brian. He's full supportive of me being in diapers and dealing with my incontinence. He knows the stress of being incontinent takes on me and knows that wearing diapers makes it so much easier on me. He knows that diapers helps me deal with the world and I don't have to stress out. It's why my doctor and even my nurses are my biggest advocated when it comes to dealing with Incontinence. If you have a good advocate, it goes along way in dealing with incontinence. 

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On 4/27/2023 at 9:24 AM, Brian said:

@Slomo

In my mind, it is not the doctor that should be making decisions that say you should be out of diapers. A diaper is a solution to an issue, and the issue is made an issue because of the person that is dealing with it, not because the doctor sees you in a diaper. if you decide that you're going to use a diaper, it is not in the best interest of any urologist to tell you that you shouldn't be. sure, they can say that it is for temporary management of incontinence, But if you are like me, and have cerebral palsy, there's no way that my doctor is going to tell me that he's gonna cure me of cerebral palsy, so there's no discussion of dealing with this. We all know that in my case there is brain damage, and usually CP includes some sort of damage to neurological function. the difference in the severity of the damage would tell how bad you have the CP, but nobody is going to try to treat my CP by trying to cure it.

as such, since you can't cure CP you have to work with the condition that you're dealing with, and treat the symptoms of the condition. A symptom of a condition can be managed, and should be managed appropriately. It is well known that a neurological disease or neurological condition depending on the situation, should be dealt with with the understanding that it is neurological and it can affect your body in different ways. for example, for some reason my right hand will start to shake For no reason sometimes And I don't know how it happens and don't know why it starts to tremor, but it does, and I have to deal with that everyone every once in awhile, while but while there are things I can do to manage that problem when it occurs, I can't stop it from happening again.

If you're incontinent, you may have the ability to be tested to find out how bad it is, or to be able to determine what causes the problem. if you're lucky enough to have the ability to use medicine or medical intervention by taking drugs that help you manage it, then that is one thing this one, if you decide that you want to do something else, that's a different thing, but it should not be up to the doctor to try to get you out of diapers because they don't think it works period to have someone tell you that is almost like saying OK just go all over the floor whenever you feel like it! that is ridiculous And no doctor would tell you to pee on the floor!

additionally I have friends that don't have any bowel or bladder control at all! this is because they don't have working plumbing, so they have no way of being able to control the muscles in their butter or bowels, And it doesn't matter how much a doctor or urologist will tell you that they don't think diapers are a good idea, they are needed, and if you tell someone who has no bowel or bladder control because they don't have control of the muscles that control those functions, regardless of what you say it's not gonna matter. They have to do whatever they do to manage the situation, And if they do that, they have ways of doing it, it might be inconvenient, and embarrassing for certain situations, but those who have to deal with incontinence because of this type of condition, they deal with it the way they deal with it, because they have no other choice.

A urologist should never tell you that you should be out of diapers. Sure, if they have a way to be able to treat your incontinence, that's one thing, But the problem now is, what happens if the drug that they try to treat you with is worse that the condition that they're trying to treat? some people don't like the effects of the drugs they use, some of them just don't like the feeling that a drug causes, or a reaction that happens. some. sometimes I think a diaper is a hell of a lot easier to deal with than to deal with a medical treatment that requires drugs. this is just my opinion, because in my opinion I don't wanna take any drugs that I don't need, an incontinence is something that is normal as far as for people that have cerebral palsy or any neurologic condition, in fact I'm been lucky most of my life that I've been able to control my bladder and bowels, But as I age it becomes harder and harder, because I'm not able to move as fast as I used to.

I agree that anybody that decides that you should be out of diapers or tells you that you shouldn't be wearing them should be fired immediately! when I went to my doctor and I asked him for help, he did not say that diapers were bad, I told them why that I wanted them, told them that I had a neurologic condition, and that CP is known to cause certain subconditions, one of them being incontinence, because people have trouble controlling muscles, so they might not be able to control what's going on. as you age you might not be able to have as much control as you did when you're 25 as you do at 50 or 75, that's usually what happens.

Finally I believe that diapers are my choice and my solution to my problem. A doctor or some sort of professional can actually give me advice, but the thing is that's important is that I can make that decision whether to take the advice or leave it, because it's my doctor, my body, my health and my treatment plan that is being discussed. A professional doctor or nurse or LPN or CNA or whatever they are, their job is to help you, but not to judge You or to tell you that you shouldn't be doing something, unless of course it impacts your health like smoking for example.

Brian

Ha, yeah. Agreed. Try saying that to a few urologists though. It will probably fall on dead ears.

My underlying issue is/was neurological signals getting crossed, more physically so than mental as it resulted from a car wreck I was in. Not the same as you, but maybe somewhat adjacent to it. 

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I just returned from getting a CT-Scan this morning for my back.  When I arranged the appointment, I told the tech that I would be wearing a diaper.  He said "not a problem."  This morning at the hospital, when as I began to disrobe, I told the tech, "I'm wearing a diaper.  Is that going to be a problem?"  The tech said "Don't worry about it.  It's not a problem."  She never gave it a glance.  Very professional.
 

--John

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I too have worn my diapers to 100's of Dr appointments (not kidding). I've talked to CT and MRI techs about my diapers, and they actually prefer we wear one rather than risk it. Because if someone might need them but doesn't wear a diaper, that can mean the tech has to stop the scan, clean the bed, then restart the scan. It's more, and messy, work they prefer not having to deal with.

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

So actually, at most the urologist is interested in this topic. However, there is a very simple reason for this: The S2 guidelines state that a supply with pads is to be preferred. So when you arrive with a diaper, he is amazed and asks why. I also had a short conversation about this topic at the beginning. But that was quickly explained. The whole point is that the pants stay dry and after the first UD there were no more questions...
Otherwise, this is usually overlooked. 

Once a dermatologist had looked a bit irritated when I to the skin cancer screening with her true - She had probably the LUTS on the questionnaire overread or expected something else and then first apologized :-).

But that was actually also until now the only time that someone has reacted astonished. 

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