Brian

@Zombie_Turtle when I deal with people that know me very well, That some of them may think differently of me because of my incontinence. Surprisingly, every single person that I have dealt with regarding my incontinence diagnosis has been very supportive very understanding, and doesn't think any different of me because of me wearing diapers. several of them have told me that it doesn't make a difference, and they would help me if it was necessary. The problem is that some people think that wearing a diaper is almost like wearing something that is revealing or something, when it's not. people wear diapers because they don't have control or because they need them, And that is why they're wearing them. They wouldn't wear if they didn't need them. Whether or not they them because they want to wear them, or because of a psychological or comfort reason, that is the decision of the person wearing them. The most important thing that I can see is that everyone should understand that people wear diapers for a myriad of reasons, and we shouldn't be making a big deal out of it, because people do it. just like somebody May decide that they wear their pants,, they wear their socks, their shoes, a shirt, and they might not wear underwear with their pants. if that is the case, that is the decision of the person wearing their clothing.**** no man The only reason that I would be worried is if somebody was actively doing something that would that would draw negative attention to themselves or other people around them. Other than that, wearing diapers is no big deal, should not be a big deal, and that is the way it is. I've had friends that wear diapers and they've done it for years, and they need them and they have them for whatever reason, and people wear also for comfort reasons com and that is considered a need, so hopefully people understand the reason why they do it. even if they didn't, that is the right of the person that is wearing, as long as the person is doing it in an appropriate manner and an appropriate time and at an appropriate place. Medical professionals such as doctors nurses CNA's LNAS he does not have, or any other type of medical professional are professional, and they see it all the time, and if they make a comment about the fact that you're wearing, it would probably be in the scope of a medical question. Doctors and nurses and other people that work with patients have seen it over and over again, and I've seen it myself, and I've even asked Nurses about it, and they don't even bat an eyelash, they would just go in and with a skill and professionalism and tact and All that, they would take care of you, and they would show concern and be supportive of someone that is wearing for whatever reason. Medical professionals don't even bat an eyelash, so them seeing diapers is normal for them, the only reason that they would question it is if they were doing some sort of a medical exam, and they were asking regarding your health status because of a change in it, which is something that they may ask, when they do the check in. They might ask you if you have enough supplies, they might ask you if you're having an issue with this or that, and they make sure that you have what you need. So far I haven't gotten any pushback, but I don't give anyone an opportunity an opportunity to push: I have made the decision that I made because of my mental health my physical health my emotional health and everything else. far too often most of the time I'm ending up jumping up and going to the bathroom, and I'm continually doing it over and over and over again. when I end up losing so much sleep that it causes me a problem, I had to make the decision, when I ended up with incontinence, IBS and diverticulitis, I had to make the decision. I needed to do it for my own well being And the best thing I ever did was to make that decision. I am glad that every one that I deal with understands what I'm doing and why I'm doing it. for anyone else that doesn't understand, then they need to not worry about it, because I'm not doing anything wrong nor would I want to make them think I'm doing something wrong. that's why my medical diagnosis are exactly what they are, and they're in my medical records, so somebody doesn't question my need for diapers, in fact they may end up offering them. Brian

@Scarth welcome! Nice to have you here my friend! 😁😁😁 Brian

just another quick question: is there such a garment that can protect you from both fecal incontinence and urinary incontinence when you're dealing with swimming? I know the idea is that you don't want to release in a swimming pool, so that is why you're wearing what you're wearing, but I was wondering if there is such a garment that you can wear that will take care of both, because I know that when you're dealing with fecal incontinence you're wearing a swim diaper to keep the fecal content within the swim diaper rather than within the pool. If there is such an animal, I'd love to be able to find it, because I can probably get it! Thanks! Brian

@Scarth the problem with people who think that just because we can stay dry in the daytime we can stay dry at night is that they don't understand that sometimes our bladders don't work the way they think they should. part of the reason why people think that way is because they think that being dry in a day means that you're dry at night, which is obviously not the truth. my brothers ended up having problems with bed wetting all the way up until possibly age 5 at the latest, And even my my brother that is three years younger than me had an issue with bedwetting. So it can happen to anyone, And that's what people have to understand, You can say dry during the day and have problems at night, and sometimes wearing protection at night is a lot better than having a wet bed, or not being able to get enough sleep. That is part of the problem, if you're constantly getting up and having to go to the bathroom all the time, you miss the opportunity to get some shut eye. @John Davis I would agree! i'd also like to point out that wearing diapers is a hell of a lot more comfortable than having wet pants, wet beds, wet anything else that you're sitting on or in. At least with a diaper, whatever you're releasing is held, and hopefully does not end up going all over your bed, And that's why you would need to have a pair of plastic pants over the top or a trifecta diaper cover. Brian

@Slomo thank you for the information about swim diapers! it seems as if they are pretty good for what they're designed for, there's just a lot of them that you can choose from, And you have to find the right one. I will be looking into this in the next couple of weeks to see what I can find. and now the Brian

@Slomo thank you for all of the awesome information! I definitely will be going into the hospital the night before the procedure. I also will probably bring at least one package of megamax, Because that seems to be how many I will use, but I'm not quite sure how strong of a dose they will give me. I will have to Ask about that when I go in, and I talk to whoever I'm supposed to. that will help me determine anything that I may need. I understand that most of this will probably be like having a major case of the runs or diarrhea, so it shouldn't be too bad, I just wanna make sure that I'm not breaking my legs to try to get to the bathroom, and that's why I'm wearing diapers. Diapers make it a lot easier and I won't have to make as many trips I hope. Once I'm cleaned out, that should be no problem, because I probably won't be able to eat after midnight anyway, the only thing I'll be taking is medicine with water. I don't know what I have decided as far as how they're gonna put me out, but I definitely will check with him. Again thank you for all of the awesome information, I will keep you advised! Brian

@Scarth what I don't like about some diapers is the fact that in my mind, you have to have a good diaper that's quality, And you also have to make sure that the diaper has good tabs and a way to attach together so that it does not cause you a problem. They always say that these diapers have the refashionable tabs, but basically what it is, is any diaper that is not a megamax for example, comes in two pieces, you end up taking both pieces off and then you're apparently going to stick the diaper tab in one position, then you take off the blue tab at the end, and apparently you can put it anywhere, but to me that is not refashionable, because that can rip the diaper and cause a problem because the tape also can get mucked up And then you have a problem. I remember using north shore supremes, and they were awesome, but the problem also can be that the tapes are not as wide, and anything that you want to use for a diaper should have good quality tapes, wide enough to be able to stick and stay stuck. megamax has the landing zone, and that's helped me Because with the landing zone at least you can stick the tape on the right place. many times if you don't have a landing zone, what happens is you end up sticking the tape to anywhere on the diaper, and the tapes are sticky enough so that so that when you stick them down they're like sticking super glue together, and that isn't coming off! I also agree that it's good that we have a selection in the diaper market now. I still wonder if you're here you're here Diaper companies will give us better choices without having to go to the next level, because the cheapest diapers don't actually do anything and they're not worthy of being called diapers, they're just dribblers, or bounty paper towels as I keep saying. The best thing to do is to have a good selection, because as has been stated everybody doesn't have the same body mechanics, everybody doesn't have the same frame, and what happens is diapers fit everyone differently, so it's always good to have a good selection, and one of the things that is important is that whatever selection we have, that it is a quality selection rather than just something made just to get by. Brian

@John Davis@Scarth I understand that a swim diaper is supposed to keep fecal matter from being able to be released in the water. I also know that if someone uses a swim diaper, then you end up with a situation where you may not be able to deal with the urination piece, And I also know exactly what a swimming diaper is supposed to do. I would never put a public a public pool in a position where they would have to do what they do to have to drain clean and refill a pool, but I have seen it happen a couple times because there is something in the pool that doesn't belong there, or they want to make sure that the pool is clean and sterile for the next person to be able to use. That is why I'm asking the question I asked, because I wanna make sure if I decide to go swimming, that if I have to urinate I'm not gonna be peeing in the water, if I have to defecate I'm not going to be releasing it into the water. we all know that swim diapers are not 100% gonna hold everything that you release, In fact I expect that it might not hold everything that you release. You have to be able to think like the worst thing that can happen will happen without me knowing about it, so I wanna make sure that I'm doing the right thing, and have the right appropriate clothing for swimming If I'm incontinent. I'm not sure if they make swim diapers like they make for kids that can hold both, But I am curious! I would never be irresponsible enough to allow something to release: However I would be remiss if I didn't have the proper equipment to deal with it that it wouldn't happen. When you're incontinent like I am, I don't wanna take any chances, and I wanna make sure that I can take care of my needs. swim diapers are things that I'm not sure of, So that is why I'm asking for help! Thank you for your advice and counsel Brian

Good afternoon all: in June this year, I will be going in for my first colonoscopy. I've heard a lot of things about how colonoscopies work, and my dad's had it at least twice, and he's had an endoscopy a couple times to make sure that he was clear both ways. my question concerns advice so that I can do my very best for this particular procedure. Usually they have people at home and they tell people to take a specific medication that can be mixed with water. I have this this medication and I'm not sure exactly how much they would make me take in order to clear my bowels in order to do that. I've been told that having a colonoscopy is hard, and I figured that it would be. I was told that it would be hard because you have to keep going between the bathroom and whatever you're sitting on or sitting in, and I was told that you were in a high dose of the medicine that I use, and that will make you go to the bathroom, to clear your bowels. I was always told by my dad that I should be walking around naked that day because I would need to use the toilet most of the time. there was only two things that I needed to figure out And one is should I sit on the toilet all day and sleep there, or is this something that once you start it will get better. I was told that it was easy to do the home prep, but I find that it is not, and I don't want to do the prep myself. My CP and all of the things that I deal with make it harder, and if what happens is that you have severe diarrhea or you have owls, you don't want to be cleaning up diarrhea and having it all over you, and then end up with burning sensation because of acidic stuff, and the release of water and whatever else. I told the doctor that I wanted to be in the hospital because of my disability. I figured the nurse would be available to help me with the prep, And because of my incontinence I'm wearing my megamax diapers. my program at home for moderate needs is specialized, and it has certain things that you can do and certain things that you can't do, and certain things that staff can do and can't do. if it's not listed on my home plan, then they have to call my case manager and ask for permission to do this particular task. if she approves it then that goes on to my plan, but when I deal with colonoscopy are any test in the hospital, then I would end up having no one to help me, because there are two problems that I would have One of them is, that if it's not on my plan, they can't do it. The second thing is they can help me clean up a mess in the bathroom for example, but I have to do all the cleaning for myself to clean myself off, and then change my own diapers. If I go to the hospital and I have it done, the nurse will be there, and I am a patient in the hospital as an internal patient, so they would be able to help me. the only I could have someone come in to be able to change diapers or help me during a procedure like this would be if I was in the high needs program, which would require me to do a whole bunch of paperwork and have a change to my plan which I don't think I need. So I told the doctor that there was no one that would be able to help me do the prep, And if there's no one to do the prep and I wasn't going in the hospital for my colonoscopy, that I wasn't gonna do it! And I told him that every test that I do from here on out that has to do with something that I can't do, that I wish to be hospitalized! all I can imagine is that somebody's gonna give me the medicine that I take in a very very high dose, I haven't Megamax on, and maybe an hour later, a whole bunch of poop is gonna come out along with a bunch of water and everything else, and I won't be able to stop until my bowels are clear, and they will keep doing whatever they do for hours And I'll just continually have this horrible discharge diarrhea to make sure that I'm clear. then in the morning, i'll go downstairs into the procedure room and they will do it right there at the hospital, i'll be in recovery, and then later on in the afternoon i'll take a ride home. I don't know how the colonoscopy works very well, especially with my condition, but all I can imagine is that I won't be able to control anything And I'll just be releasing anything I'm holding. This is why I decided to go in the hospital for this procedure, and thank God for my Mega Max's, because no hospital diaper is going to be quality enough to take care of it. I've heard people say colonoscopy isn't that bad! Unfortunately, because of my disability, and my need my need for help to get this stuff right, I need to go into the hospital for stuff like this. I can't do it on my own And no nurse can come out to help me for one night, it would cost a fortune and I don't even think that's Fair, so I told him that I needed to be in the hospital. He made sure that happened, and the next thing I have to do is go for that particular procedure. I'm not very scared, I'm just wondering: if being if being urinarily incontinent means that you're constantly peeing all over the place, when you do a colonoscopy that medicine will make you poop everywhere, and all I can say is I feel like it would be a rainstorm of whatever is in my bowels. maybe I think that it's kinda weird, or maybe what I'm thinking is I'm thinking too much, and I think it's worse than it actually is, but this type of a procedure doesn't scare me, but incontinence will be a factor, but In some ways I'm feeling like this will be interesting, because even though it will feel embarrassing doing it, I have the diaper so they'll expect it to be used and helped me all the way through, the nurses will help me change diapers and they will help me keep myself clean and make sure and I do what I'm supposed to do. Am I thinking that a colonoscopy is worse than it actually is? i've heard from my dad the way they do it for him, but they have to take his trake out and run run the camera through the hole in his neck. my dad is 76 years old so my dad has to deal with everything that has to be done in colluding making sure that he doesn't get sick or have any problems with his breathing. He's had the end of Scopy and he's had other ones But I sometimes wonder how this will work, and wonder how the thrill of teaching all of that water will feel Like because I'm thinking that once they give me that medicine, it will be like a rainstorm came in and I will be peeing and pooping everywhere, so I have to have good diapers. Now I have one final question: when I go into the hospital I will have my go bag on the back of my chair. I usually carry 5 Mega Max diapers, but I don't know how many diapers I should take with me to the hospital to make sure that I can use my own. I've heard horror stories about hospital diapers being no better than bounty paper towels, and I don't really understand if there is a diaper that I could use that the hospital provides that helps me with it, but it's probably not going to work. I will do my megamaxes, but I'm not even sure how many that I would need? Thoughts? Brian

@Incont I have worked in many positions as a volunteer. My most important position that I worked in as a volunteer was a server operator on Tallahassee Freenet. I did that from 1995 until 2017, when we got the sad news that we lost our provider, so we had to shut it down. I haven't heard anything that says we're gonna reopen it, but I've had a lot of memories being on being an operator over there, being on chat every night, trying to help people, and then having awesome discussions that sometimes go till three in the morning, similar to what we would do over on daily diapers chat, just talk about anything to keep ourselves busy Laugh and have a grand all time, and I like that part. Sometimes though you had to get a little bit tougher, because there was always an idiot that would break the rules and we'd have to tell him that it was against the rules, then they would sometimes fight us, and they would threaten us Comments would have to use our power, and then they would complain, and of course based on the administrators decision, most of the time we would win. I met a lot of good people while I was there, and I actually went to Florida four times, the first three were to see my friends at Tallahassee Freenet, the 4th time I went in 2016 was when I saw my brother at Westgate condos. My next job that I work at currently is that I am the director of the community Thrift store in Montpelier VT. this was a dream of my friend who have a thrift store, so we went to the pastor at the time, and then pitch the idea. long story short, she approved it, that Monday, they were downstairs and looking around, and my friend was asking why he was in a dank dark place that stunk, and she told him that this was going to be the place for the thrift store. people were grumbling because they lost one room at the food pantry, but she said that she wanted to make sure that we were able to do it, and it was a good idea, and it was a that will help people so we had about four weeks to do this, And we opened in 2009 in November. I took over in 2017, when my friend retired. this is a job that I really enjoy, 'cause I get to help people. sometimes it's a pain in the neck because you have to deal with the politics, you have to deal with volunteers that are telling you ohh this is wrong or this is wrong again Or you better ask this or you better ask that, but most of the time it's a good setup because I have a few volunteers that help me keep this store running. i've always wanna be in the position that I did Just, So I ended up waiting eight years to be promoted to that position. I ended up getting promotions at least twice during my tenure, and I'll tell you that my friend had called me just to ask me some computer questions, and set up computers in the store, and then the next thing I know because of my skill he wanted me to work with him, and the rest is history! I took over as director in 2017, we had a flood in 2016 and we had to rebuild, So he didn't leave Vermont until that was complete, and I had everything I needed. The church ended up stepping up stepping up and putting us back together, and we had to deal with all that. So this job is a current one and I enjoy it, but man I'm telling you, I don't know how Mike deals with it, but he is one of the most patient men i've ever heard of He always uses his head and he makes the decisions that he thinks are appropriate. I have to make those decisions sometimes, but I still think sometimes that somebody wants to override my decisions or try to change my mind! they can try that But I have to make the best decision possible in a comma And sometimes people don't understand my motives, but I try to do the best I can. I also own Buddy - Baker dot com, org, info and my current domain which is the main domain dot US. I maintain all of these websites one of them for the store, and then the rest Yeah I use for different purposes. I got into doing stuff online when of the free net gave me access to the shell. Let me tell you I thought that I was going to break the system, but he told me that I couldn't do it And just to take my time and learn. because of his help and his support, one day I ended up getting an email, And that email told me that I was promoted to assistant webmaster, responsible for their websites. So I started working on a help system, helping them so they can learn how to use the menu system to get what they needed to get. I wrote all of the help files, I end up answering questions on the email aliases and all this type of stuff. in 1998, I wrote my first plan to do a website. And it was in the home directory of my free net account. Little did I know that writing the first website would lead to me having a bug that tells me I need to work on websites, I want to have my own server and all of this, and I talk to my friends and found that it was expensive sometimes and that it can be a pain in the neck! also found out that there are problems that can happen such as dead hard drives and electrical problems, I have had actually a server explode in my living room, so I know how that is. In 2008 I ended up starting the US domain: this is when I got my first server which is an IBM work server, And the thing was as big as probably Mike's couch, the thing was large The thing was wide and the thing made enough noise to wake up the world. my partner at the time ended up finding out just how noisy this thing was and I had it in my apartment. when I had the thing on the fans were running all the time, and when you did something important they would spin up. they made so much noise that my friend disabled at least one of the fans, and then he found out that a couple months later the drive was dead and then the whole thing went. I got myself a computer again and I made a Linux machine And I put my first website up. After that, I learned Linux and I've been learning Linux for years, and I learn how to configure it, I learned how to install things that I need, and I learned some things that might probably has to know in order to maintain these websites. I ended up installing my own form software as a test, And I still have that forum, but I have learned a lot because I take the time to do important things to keep my mind busy. I'm not sure why some of my friends think that I'm wasting my time at work or that I'm not doing a good job! I do the best I can and I've been doing a lot for years, and I'm trying to be the best guy I can be! sometimes it's really hard, because you have people that might not believe that you can do it, or they end up saying that it's a bad idea, or they try to push you because they think it's bad. i've had a lot of good people that tell me that I can do anything that I want as long as I put my mind to it. all of my domains are there because I put my mind to it and I wanted it I paid for it I got it! nobody's gonna take it away from me, no one's gonna make me have to worry anymore. I have my server and I'm so proud, But sometimes it's a pain in the neck because you lose files or you have to make sure you back it up, are you updated. but the thing is with my job, it's one of those type of jobs that you can do at home just like Mike, And sometimes you have to sit in a chair and you have to pound on the keyboard for a few hours to make sure that your site is working properly and you end up talking to your friends online. During the pandemic, my world changed along with the rest of the world! I remember very clearly that I would wake up at 7 in the morning and I would go to bed at like 1 o'clock in the morning. During the pandemic my schedule change, and I was going to bed at 4 AM And then I would wake up at like 4 PM, and get something to eat and then I would be back on the chat. This is something that I did throughout the worst of the pandemic when nothing was open, you couldn't go anywhere, there was nothing that we could get unless we had special permission from doctors or the hospitals or somewhere that we could go, and it was just a pain. So I would go out maybe get some air, and then I'd come back in and I'd be talking to people on the chat server. My schedule was flipped upside down and I was totally blown away because I became a member here And then the pandemic hit in 19 and we were going full blast And then in 20 everything went independent mode And here we were. I've learned a lot, and even through the pandemic I kept my cool and I kept working on websites and I kept on going to the doctor and doing other things. During the pandemic it was hard, but I still did work so that I could keep myself sharp. I might not be able to do some of these jobs like drive trucks or forklifts or lift a heavy boxes and stuff like that like my brothers can, or more like my brother Dan in the Air Force Reserve, or my brother Eric who's a teacher, but I do what I can do and I can help people. My Brother James takes care of radiologic stuff, and he does the MRIS and he does the cat scans and other things they ask him to do. I'm very proud of my brother and there's a lot of things that I can do because they can help me, and there's other things that I don't worry about. All in all life is cool, and I'm glad I have the job I have, but sometimes it is a pain. People told me that when I retired it would be to have fun or to relax or go somewhere interesting. because I'm 50 years old, I don't think I'll ever get to the point where I can retire, And that's why I always say that I work as a volunteer, and I jokingly say that I retired at 30. I also worked in the food service industry at the senior meals site And I was doing computer work and clerical stuff for my boss, who I've known since I was six. the poor lady died before the pandemic at the age of 83, but I'll always remember her because she was Italian And I'm telling you she was Really awesome because she taught me a lot of different stuff about food service. She taught me how to do the records, and I computerized the entire operation, on my own time with my own software, because I love what I was doing. I had to retire from this job because people in the using it's already we're accusing me of ruining equipment or saying that I caused malfunctions that made the computer unusable, when the problem was that the new computer we purchased had a dead hard drive in it to start. So they they kept on blaming me for a whole bunch of stuff and it was just a pain! so I'm glad that I'm finally able to do what it is that I want to do. just like my parents, they retired and they wanted to be able to do something special, so my step dad bought a motorcycle, and my parents are constantly on the motorcycle as much as they can, and I bet you they've been to every corner of the state, and I bet you they've been too canada maybe, And I think they made of even gone down and the most of Florida come but I'm not sure. The point is my parents are having fun, and they're enjoying themselves, and I have the same thing going on, but people worry about me sometimes. I try to keep myself up and try to stay happy, and my brother is here every day so it helps me, But I'm telling you right now work can suck sometimes, but we won't deal with it everyday, and with my diapers, it makes it really easier! Brian

@Marks welcome to the site! One of the things that is important is that when you have incontinence or you're dealing with bed wedding or something that causes you stress or sometimes as inconvenient is to learn how to deal with it effectively. in my case I've been incontinent all my life on and off, and that would depend specifically on the situation that I deal with, With. Sometimes you have to find a way that makes sense to you to be able to handle a problem. bed wetting and incontinence go hand in hand, because in both cases you are losing control of of your bladder or your bowels one is in your bed, one may be in your diaper or something like that, and so they are related in some ways and different in others. When I was 46, I joined our sister site daily diapers because I was having problems with incontinence accidents IBS diverticulitis and just having a hell of a time trying to deal with the fact that I may not have as much control as I used to. I also had to deal with the fact that my mobility is limited Sometimes I can't move as fast as I used to, And the thing that really hurt me, was that there are sometimes where I'm just sitting in my chair. I feel something in my back end, and I can't even put my hands on my chairs arms to be able to stand up to be able to deal with the issue, I've already done it in the diaper and it's all done. that is that is what happens with incontinence Sometimes you have no control, and it just happens You might feel it You might smell it, but you may not have a way to deal with it right away, it just happens. My feeling is that incontinence is just a condition, just like cerebral palsy or any other type of neurological condition. you have to deal with its good parts, it's bad parts, and all of the emotions and feelings and everything that goes through your head. you have to live your life and you have to learn how to deal with situations and have ways to cope with things that bother you. as a child, you learn how to deal with responsibility And you learn a bunch of different stuff, and your parents help you through a lot of things that might be something that you can't handle, but they're there to help you.. Bed wetting and incontinence art are two things that are difficult to deal with in some ways. once you find a way to deal with your incontinence and or bed wetting, you can learn strategies how to deal with it, and get the proper equipment to deal with it, and once you get that equipment, and you change the way you deal with your bathroom habits, and you find an appropriate way to deal with that situation, having incontinence is about as easy as having cerebral palsy because you know what your body's gonna do, you know that for example your knee might give out, or whatever else. it depends on your body and what happens. incontinence is not the fault of anyone, it's just a fact of life Your systems that deal with excretory does not deal with incontinence and fecal incontinence, so they end up just releasing anything they're holding because they don't have the ability to hold. the diapers are there to help you, and the most important thing is let them help you, because you have a lot more things in life that are important and things that you wanna do, places you wanna go, people you wanna see, people that love you, and an incontinence is like a stop sign that you have to deal with, and you find out how to deal with the stop sign, and then you're able to pull out the stop sign and it's not stopping you anymore. It's important to understand that it is hard to deal with something that you may not accept or understand! I went through that myself, and I finally came to the realization that incontinence is nothing to worry to worry about, because if you have the right equipment, you have the right supports, and you have a good reason, you should be able to have what you need. diapers have changed my life 110% in the positive direction, and I can't say it enough: people think people think that diapers are bad for some reason, but once they realize that they are helpful to some, they might change their mind. I think part of the problem is is that people think diapers are terrible or yucky or something like that And I'm not sure why they have the stigma that diapers are only for babies, And there is so much stigma about adults wearing diapers. As I've learned, wearing a diaper is no different than wearing underwear, because underwear is something is something that you wear, something that you put between your body your body parts and your pants, and what is the difference between a diaper and underwear Question THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE! That's right There is no difference except one: that under are cotton, And everyone wearing underwear usually pulls them down to be able to go to the bathroom. A diaper is different because a diaper has internal padding has plastic shell, and is designed for people to be able to release anything they're holding with their body. A diaper is easily changed, and sometimes diapers are easier than having to deal with underwear, because all you're dealing with is taking the diaper off, maybe throwing it away, and then getting another one and putting it on. for me, the plastic back diapers are important to me, because I grew up in a situation in the 70s where the only diapers that were available were pampers. Those things were big, Those things smelled good, and they were and they were very very thick. When you have incontinence you want a diaper that's going to be able to deal with it. once you find that diaper, everything will be OK! diapers are special underwear! they are designed to be to be something that you can use when you can't get to the toilet on time, or you can't use the toilet 'cause everything happens so fast. once you learn about what you're dealing with like the condition, you end up doing your research, you end up finding products that work for you, and you start using them and you like them, then part of the big problem big problem will be solved, because you have what you need and you're able to say I'm going to live my life this way. incontinence should never stop anyone from doing what they are doing, cause they're basically doing what they want, they're just wearing a diaper instead of normal underwear, and as such they have to be careful about how the diaper is used when it is used, and that is only because you have to be able to tell when you have to change. People's plumbing that doesn't work, that would be a problem, but eventually someone finds out that you have used your diaper, and you have to change it. Once you find a good system stay with it: don't let diapers put you down, or make you feel less of a man or a woman! there are plenty of people who wear diapers every day, and I don't even know how many where diapers in the United States are around the world, but I would say it is a huge number. especially in Japan in China maybe, where diapers are popular and used for what they are required to be used for. I bet you there's plenty of companies that make diapers in Japan or China because that is important to their people. There are a lot of people in the world that are incontinent. the trick is you have to find a way to be able to own incontinence and tell it that you are the boss! by wearing diapers that is one way to tell incontinence that you are the boss. the same thing can be said of bed wetting If you are wearing diapers, because you are using a method to control it. people that decide to wear diapers for whatever reason have made that choice to control it that way, and as such we found our way to be able to do it. it is very embarrassing to deal with incontinence sometimes, and the best thing to do is to get by the horns and ride it, beat it, and you beat it by wearing diapers or using other sources of medicines or supports. once you have it under control, your life can be a better life because you don't have to worry all the time about Peeing or pooping your pants! lots of people work around and do different things in their diapered! Because your diapered, that should not stop you from doing the things that you want. people have to realize that people do wear diapers, see you may see somebody in diapers. one of the things that @Incont has instilled in us is that you need to be responsible, and do not be showing diapers to people to people who may not want to see them, but if you're incontinent, you have to wear diapers or do something to help you, so people have to understand that people will wear diapers, it's legal it's appropriate, and it doesn't bother many people, unless they let it bother them. diapers are important, because it takes away that responsibility that you have to use the bathroom in the toilet! some people can't do that because of disability, some people can't do it because they can't get to the toilet in time, sometimes they're downstairs plumbing is broken, but the problem is people have a stigma about diapers being bad, and that's what we have to change. We have to let people know that wearing diapers is a choice, wearing diapers is some sort of a choice that someone makes to make their life easier, and why would somebody be offended if somebody wears diapers. I can see if somebody were to be exhibitionist and be walking around with a shirt or no shirt and a diaper with shoes, and it's an adult. People may end up asking questions, but the thing is you have you have to be responsible when you're doing whatever you're doing, because you may not want to draw attention to yourself by others. you are the one that's in charge, and you use the solution you think works the best. most people probably would understand that there are people that wear diapers because of incontinence, but the most important thing is to not let someone make you feel bad or strange or whatever because of it. incontinence is not your fault It's just something that happens, just like a baby The baby is not expected to go and use the toilet. That's why a diaper is available, it has to learn how to use its bodily functions, and that's why a parent goes through the toilet training process. i'm glad that you We're able to continue to live the life you want to live! diapers are not a problem, and we have to let people know that regardless of their thoughts about it, it's not bad, and it doesn't cause a major problem unless somebody lets it become a problem. I'm wearing one right now and I can tell you right now that I'm more comfortable in a diaper than I would be in underwear, cause every time you turn around you have to adjust your underwear or scratch or do something else and everything is so tight. with a diaper at least you have a absorbent pad to be able to use, But as I said you found a way to make your life easier, and diapers have been that choice! congratulations and welcome! I hope to see you again on the forms or in chat over here! Brian

@John Davis i've heard of Nullo, as a deodorant for fecal incontinence, And I guess what they tell you is that Nullo will help you get rid of the smell. I'm not sure how effective it will be, and what and what usually happens is that you do end up taking something sometimes and it causes constipation which, which is something that I deal with and I have appropriate medication to help me with that. I'm not sure exactly if I should try nullo or if I should try some other product, because you've warned us that you may have a higher and higher need for doses, And you said that it causes constipation. I'd love to be able to try something like that, but I'm not sure where I would get the Nullo, or if it's just something that you get like a prescription. if it's something you get on Amazon, it might be interesting to have some to test it out. As @John Davis Said, I Would also like to hear experiences with fecal deodorant to find out how good or how bad they are. it is always a good idea to be able to ask the community questions and see what their experiences are. you learn a lot from doing that, and you may end up adopting something that you see because you of a recommendation. it's always good to have friends that are in the same position, because they can help you through whatever you're dealing with, supporting you all the way, because all of us are in the same position We are incontinent because of different reasons, but we're still here and we will persevere! Brian

I live in the northeast, in central Vermont area, in a city called Barre, which is split into two sections. There is a Barre City, where I live, And there's also a town of Barre. I started my school career for example in the city called, And then when I finished third grade, they found that the town school was better set up for my disabilities and my needs, so my parents started sending me there. this is called the granite capital of the world because we deal with so much different types of granite. I'm not sure how the granite industry is doing nowadays, but I am assuming the pandemic did a lot of damage to businesses, but hopefully they all come back. Vermont is known for its maple syrup and for its teddy bears and for its forests and whole bunch of other different things. I'm sure that where @Incont is there are places that he can go, that may be special to him, but I always Was enjoying camping and just hanging out with my friends, and just letting you mind relax and just not worry about things. sometimes I think that we forget We all need to be able to take a step back and realize what we have and what we need, not worrying about what we don't have or worrying about things that we can't change. The reason why this is this is important is because if you worry about things you cannot change, you worry yourself into a situation where you go crazy and then you think there is a problem and you're trying to solve it, and you have to be able to stay calm and level headed to be able to solve it. I've learned strategies to be able to deal with situations that are and do come up every day! I noticed that when I'm wearing diapers for example, that I don't have to worry about 'cause I have the right equipment to take care of it, and I have also that ability ability to use it. I've also changed my body that it is OK to do it, and because I'm wearing a diaper, I don't feel as nervous as I was, because when I release when I'm holding, I always think of that as all the stress in the bad stuff that you get rid of, because what you are releasing may smell bad and doesn't belong in your body, so you want to get rid of it. When you have stress and worries and everything else, the best way I can think of it is that when you use your diaper, you are getting rid of whatever you don't need, And there are certain things that happen with your stomach so you end up with a lot of pain. Once you get rid of the pain you feel a lot better, you get rid of the pain, you get rid of the stuff you don't need, and that is done by changing the diaper and cleaning yourself up. Sometimes I wish I could go somewhere where there's a bunch of different awesome things like trees and birds, and a whole bunch of animals that were really nice and ones that you can be friends with or something like that. or a place where I can go fishing, and be able to catch fish, or just be able have fun in the water and enjoy time with my friends. i've met a lot of people online and daily diapers Is no exception to this, and I'm sure I will meet a lot of people on incont.org once we get the chat system online, which is online, but then we have to have the users, and then Mike will have to decide who will help him with the chat system over here.' I always liked summer! The reason I do is because I am in disabled man who doesn't get out very much in the winter, and when I get out, I just basically bored a bus or a get in a car and go somewhere. it's basically get up get in the vehicle drive out drive back. in the summer also you can go almost anywhere, and you can do almost anything 'cause you're not dealing with the snow, and you're not dealing with extreme cold, And it's really easy to move around. You trade the cold for the heat, and you just have to learn how to deal with it. over the years I have had to deal with air conditioning because it gets so hot you can't even deal with it sometimes in my asthma activates. I also like summer because we would go someplace and have fun with friends or family, or just hang out and be ourselves and laugh and have a good time. I still have this feeling, so much so that I wrote a story over on daily diapers that is a dream of what I wish would happen, at some sort of summer resort! not sure that any resort does this kind of stuff that I'm dreaming of And I know that's not gonna happen, but it's always good to have a story that you can have and you can expand on. I always like the summer because of all the things you can see, and the heat, and the wind, and everything else that deals with summer. i've been in alabama and Tallahassee, So I know that there is a definite difference between the northern I just told him US and the southern US. specifically I should say the northeast and the southeast. I've learned that in Vermont, the wind is different, it may be cold, but after you get down to Florida, you are originally think that the weather is gonna be nice, the air feels good, and you just think you can stay out in the sun and have fun! wrong! because you have to make make sure you're not out in the sun too long or you burn like a cinder. I wonder sometimes how it is to live in the south during the winter months like say January to April. I think I stayed in Tallahassee the second time almost until whoops Easter, but I missed the northeast and wanted to come home. When you go down South and you deal with a difference in the weather, you think Oh my god this is really nice. Sometimes I wonder if I should move, but I like Vermont. I guess I'm just an old guy that likes where he is, because of the memories that he has of all the fun that we have. it is my hope that I have something fun to do this summer Of course! Brian

I'm writing this because I wanted to ask a very serious question, and I know that we will be able to talk about the best products. in my case I would like to find out what the best swim diaper would be. I'm not sure how you would use such a swim diaper, but I know that a swim diaper is used to keep the fecal matter contained within it, while allowing someone to use the diaper for urination and have that stay within it as well. from what I understand, you put a swim diaper on, and then you're supposed you're supposed to be able to use it, and anything that comes out is held tightly in that swim diaper. So I ask this question: what is the best type of swim diaper for someone to be able to swim? i've heard of rules in pools And I'm not sure exactly if they allow people to swim if they have incontinence and they use swim diapers, but I'm not sure exactly how you would approach such a question to be able to find out if it's OK to be able to swim if you're using a swim diaper. I know that a swim diaper does not work like a plastic backed diaper or a cloth diaper, because that's not what it's designed for, but I would like to find out the best swim diapers to use, because I want to make sure that if I have to swim or I want to swim, I keep myself active while also not allowing my incontinence to stop me from doing what I want to do. I can't help help the fact that I'm incontinent, and I've always been taught that if you have a problem, you try to find a solution to fix it, sometimes things are not fixable, but having a swim diaper would be more advantageous I think, because then I would be able to swim without worrying about what I release. I'm lucky that I don't have zero control of bowel movement, but I'm not sure exactly how safe it would be if I didn't wear a swim diaper considering that I have been releasing when my body. Tells me to So how do you go about getting quality swim diapers that can hold what they're supposed to hold? I'm wondering if a swim diaper is supposed to be something that is supposed to seal all the way around, so that you can be in the water and not be worried about what you are releasing. Thoughts? Brian

@jw1 Welcome! Nice to have you here! please let us know if we can help you in anyway, we are all together in this together and if we work together we can help many people! Brian

I agree that the best way to do any diaper shopping is to go online. no diaper that I have ever seen in a store has even come close to anything that is absorbent to be able to deal with anything other than an occasional dripping leaky situation. unless you can go to a brick and mortar store that sell that sells adult diapers and supplies, that has quality diapers like in Las Vegas, anything that is available to the general public rea''y dtinks. i've said it before and I'll say it again: if you're incontinent, you need a diaper that will be able to handle whatever you need to release. when you go to a doctor and the only thing they can give you because Medicaid won't cover it for the first time is a cheap diaper, you would probably want The best diaper you can get. Incontinent both ways and severely incontinent, any diaper that you find that the state will give you the first time out or you can find in a store will not qualify as a good diaper. When you go shopping for diapers, you have to determine what type of diaper you want, what type of diaper works for you, what they look like, or the style of it, and then you have to determine how much of the product you want. The only disadvantage is if you need to have them delivered to your house You don't want somebody that is not aware of your need for diapers available to pick up the package, or you'd have a bunch of questions You probably don't want to answer. If you're already incontinent, and people know about it, then it would be no problem They would just take the box and put it inside like my brother does when I get an order from North Shore. You also have to be careful because if you don't have a place to drop them that would be a private place, you may not be able to order a lot of product. you have to determine how much you can order, whether you order by the bag or by the case. I ordered by the case because I get 90 a month, but when you're dealing with a fedex locker or a UPS locker you might end up having a limit to how much you order. the local Walgreens down here where I live is the place where that locker is for fedex. Luckily I can have that delivered, and when I have it delivered I don't have to worry about going after it, I just have to remember to take care of what comes in and then get rid of the boxes. So yeah, the public package lockers from fedex or UPS or any other company that has a local package locker are probably your best bets. I think she's after Brian

@Slomo Right again one of the most important things is you have to have the proper equipment to deal with the situation. A diaper is a diaper, but every diaper is different, and every diaper has its positives and its negatives Period to me a diaper is a plastic backed solution Because if you are fully incontinent both ways severely incontinent by the way, you probably don't wanna be wearing a cloth diaper because this cloth diaper is not going to be able to hold anything that you are trying to release. The only way a cough diaper works well is if you end up putting on multiples and then covering them up with appropriate diaper diaper covers your diaper is the most important thing. the better the diaper the better the quality, the easier it will be to do exactly what it needs to do. if you're using the cheap diapers, then the diaper is not going to last long, and or it would leak and cause major problems. I can't tell you how many times during 2019 and 2020 that I would have a problem with my stomach or something like that or something would make me sick, and whatever it did it went right through me, and then and then before I knew it, the diaper was on but it never held what it was supposed to, and left a mess all over my bed all over me all over what I was wearing, and it didn't even provide any provide any odor control, because diapers are cheap, because, because all of the insurance companies want the cheapest possible things available for those that are under insurance coverage. In my case the best diaper is the one that works best for me which is the Mega Max. A Mega Max is based on the fact that a person is incontinent both ways and severely incontinent It is based on a 12 hour use, because it is designed to last 12 hours. The problem with most diapers now is that they don't even last too, because that's the way insurance companies want them to last. One of the things that makes no sense to me, although I guess it does if you're an insurance company, is that instead of making a person comfortable, and maintaining their dignity and their and their mobility and their ability to function, people use the cheapest possible things. Because they're using the cheap stuff, they always seem to have problems with the way it works, and they always seem to have a severe mess to clean up, because the quality of the diaper went down the toilet, because the insurance companies don't want us to have good products. When you're a baby and you are being raised as a kid, your mother needs to be able to make sure that you're comfortable and that you can last more than 15 minutes in a diaper. Sometimes I think when we're growing up our parents had it better than we did because they knew exactly what to do. New diapers nowadays don't even hold a candle to what they were back in the 70s eighties or 90s. It seems like ever since they took the plastic plastic out of diapers and made them all clothed back And then they took out all of the perfumes and dyes want out of them because they wanted to protect a child's skin or whatever, because a hyperologenic stuff. I can understand that, because if you're allergic to it, it would cause problems with it wearing it. If you're totally incontinent you need the best diaper possible. I can't believe that some of the places that I called when I did all of my research in 2018 2019 and 2020, would tell me that anything that they are selling is comparable to something that I would expect. If I'm totally incontinent for example, I'm not looking for a bounty paper towel to stick on my **** to be able to use. I am looking for a diaper that will be able to withstand it, and be able to withhold the odor so that I so that I can deal with it with dignity and with Grace and skill. most of these companies keep on trying to push their products on us like the prevail air and all of the other garbage diapers out there, telling us that it's the best they're gonna get But they always tell us that they want us to use their products, but if you Really take a look at this, what should happen are these companies that make these crappy diapers should be forced to use their own products, and then they should have to sit in their own mess in their own products and be able to tell me how wonderful their products are not! the best thing that you can do for a person that is severely incontinent is to keep them dry comfortable happy and clean and clean. none of the diapers that are out there nowadays can even come close to that, without being that can be dealt with easily. If you're dealing with cloth diapers and you are used to it, then that's one thing, if you're washing them every week that's another thing, But for me having a good quality mega Max diaper is 100 times better than having anything anything that is cloth backed available out there to use. Remember the idea here is that the OP is it is saying that she does not know if you can put on a clean diaper and maintain it clean all night. In my case, that is an impossibility. Most of the time you want the diaper there to be able to help you, but the best thing to do is to make sure that you have a good diaper in case you can't get to the bathroom on time, and you have to have the proper equipment to deal with it. which means that you must have a diaper cover and a good diaper, and maybe even a onesie to be able to keep the diaper in position. the idea of wearing a diaper is so that you don't have to get up Period of course you're gonna have to get up and change the diaper, but if you have a good 12 hour diaper, then i'm messing your diaper that you have to clean up, but it would be a lot easier than having to deal with a bounty paper towel as your diaper. Any person that is incontinent should use the system that works for them. regardless of what type of diaper system you use whether it decloth whether it be plastic backed, whether it be a IO or whether it be something different different: you need to have a good diaper, you also need to have a good diaper cover, and you also should have a way to keep the diaper in position so that it doesn't leak. order control is the most important thing, you wouldn't want to wear a diaper that stinks to high heavens simply because it is low quality. I've seen it happen where I am wearing a really messy one, and it smells bad, but most of what has been ejected is dried out because of the fact that the diaper is so good at absorbing liquid If. if it absorbs liquids and it holds it in, all you have to do is clean off the mess and you're golden. So that's why I say the best thing that you can do is have good equipment and a good diaper. You can't even get the first base if you don't have a quality diaper to be able to put on before you put the other equipment over it! it would be like if I tried to sell a car without a battery, and I wouldn't sell my battery! that is ridiculous, because he would need such a battery. you need a good diaper in order to be able to take care of your issues. As has been stated I wouldn't worry about whether you keep your diaper clean or dirty. If you can keep it clean wonderful, but I wouldn't worry about it. The reason you're wearing a diaper is for whatever reason, you may not be able to have the ability to hold it, and you might not be able to deal with it right away, so instead of having to run your diaper is there. the better the diaper the better the way that you can handle it. that is that is one thing that I wish that all of these diaper companies would understand. if you spend money and you make a good product people will flock to you, and people will say hey this is a good product! Good luck! Brian

@emily1890 I agree with @Apache - this might sound silly but it's the same thing that probably we were taught when we were growing up. we use the bathroom before bed, and then if incontinent or a bedwetter, you put a diaper on. if you go into the bathroom and try to empty the sort of speak before you go to bed, you may end up having less of an opportunity to soil yourself at night. however, I must give you a word of warning: do not lose any sleep over it if for some reason you end up with a dirty diaper. as I said a dirty diaper just means that you are driving back being able to get rid of what you don't need, and it is not a good idea to try to fight your body your body if it's trying to release. A dirty diaper just indicates that you need to use the bathroom, And I can guarantee you when I get up in the morning my diaper is soaked! Brian

@emily1890 I am not sure if what you are are looking for is possible, and the reason I say that is because when you are when you are dealing with a situation where are you are wearing and using a diaper, for whatever reason, most of the time you want to try to keep your diaper clean if you are trying hard. My problem is that I went to diapers 24/7 because of the amount of time I was spending in the bathroom at night on the toilet waiting for something to happen that never did, or what happens is I end up waiting and I can't get up fast enough to be able to deal with the situation, so I end up evaluating evaluating the situation and then going to change if necessary. I've learned from experience that it would be kind of silly to expect it You would be waking up in a clean diaper. the reason I say that is because I put one on when I go to bed, and I wear one anyway all day long, so to expect that I'm going to have a dry diaper in the morning would be like expecting me to grow two heads! part part of the reason I went to diapers 24/7 is because I did not want to waste my time and worry about the fact that I was constantly having accidents or constantly up all night and not being able to sleep. when you have a diaper on most of the time, you can sleep because you don't have to worry. Sure you're gonna end up making a mess, and you might have a dirty diaper, and you might have to change it in the middle of the night, but if you are doing that, then at least if you are waking up in a dirty diaper, you're not waking up and having to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, because your diaper is there to help you. For example last night I ended up having to get up twice. because I knew I was eating something that would go through my stomach, I took a diaper off and went in and used the bathroom because I had to clear my bowels. When I eat something that is very greasy or otherwise makes contact with my system and it's something that I don't seem to process well, what usually happens is I end up with a dirty diaper. then like you said, you end up spending half the time either in the bathroom cleaning yourself up, or you end up spending most time trying to get back to sleep. Part of my way to take care of that is to make sure I'm taking my hydroxyzine and take other drugs such as baclofen and acetaminophen as well as gabapentin to help me relax and not have my limbs go crazy because of autonomic response so it's there's no Way to sometimes calm down my muscles if they're constantly moving or if I'm not comfortable in bed. It might sound silly, but making sure I'm fully medicated helps me to sleep, and I would rather use my diaper and get up and change it rather than have to get up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom over and over, which is why I went to diapers in the first place, along with the fact that I was having problems with diverticulitis IBS and accidents, And it's a lot easier to deal with that situation if you are prepared for it. far too often things happen for a reason, and I have a feeling that this happened the way it did because of something that was changing in my body. as I keep saying I am not afraid of having a dirty diaper and I'm not afraid of using it. it's the taboo that you have to get over, the fact that a grown man or a grown woman may have to use a diaper rather than a toilet sometimes, i've gotten over that stigma and I and I try to help others deal with other things. As I said I don't think that you can say that you will always have a clean diaper, I don't think that that is possible very often if you are actually known to use the diaper at night because if you have to go, you're going to go. using the potty training or Change to your diet or your liquid intake may end up cutting down cutting down on the amount of stuff that you drink or eat, but if you really have to go, you will go anyway, so I don't think that expecting to have a clean diaper is something that is realistic if you are using your diaper as intended, and it also depends on your availability to hold. if for some reason you can't hold it, you will have a dirty diaper, and if you have a dirty diaper, at least hopefully you don't have a wet bed or a dirty bed. When I first went to diapers, I was having accidents twice a night at some points, and then I was using the wrong diapers, which made the mess even worse, and I've never ever made a mess in my own bed like that like that. sure I've made a mess in hospitals, when something went through me and they just help me clean up, but not really in my bed that way, and if I had made a mess I don't remember when that was. I'm glad I went to diapers because I'm not sure what is going to be released or when, And sometimes I can't get to the bathroom fast enough to be able to do anything, and to make it worse, the last time that couldn't get to the bathroom that fast It was almost like a dead ringer because I had already felt something, but it was something that happened so fast that I couldn't even say OKI have to do this, I had already done it before I even rose for my chair to walk across the room. when you end up with that kind of sensitivity, wearing diapers is a good idea because you're not sure how fast things will happen or why it happens so quickly. In closing all you do know however is that there's something that is going on, and you have to find a way to deal with the situation. wearing a diaper is the appropriate action in my case, and I wouldn't worry about how dirty diaper, but it sounds to me like you have done everything that you can do to make sure that as much as possible you are limiting your intake with your liquid your food and other foods that might be causing issues, but I don't think the limiting your intake of food or drink would stop having a dirty diaper, that may be because of some sort of medical condition or medical reasoning. I was always of the impression that if I had to release, the reason why I have a diaper on is so I can do it without feeling bad about it, and I have had dirty diapers before, during the day, during the night, sometimes at work, but regardless of what happens you will have a dirty diaper, just a matter of is there a reason why you're having a dirty diaper at a certain time of day or night? Unless there is something that you think or maybe a medical professional thinks is causing you to soil yourself or have a dirty diaper every morning, and they think there's a medical reason for it. other than that, the only thing I can suggest is that you have done what you can do, And unless there is a way to keep from messing your diaper, I don't think there's much to say other than the fact that it just happens. I know that it can be a pain in the butt, but I would rather dirty diaper then a wet or dirty bed. Keep us advised of the situation, I would love to see if there is a way that you were able to solve this problem! sometimes having incontinence means that you have to do things differently or try differing strategies, but want to but one thing I have learned is that I'd rather have a dirty diaper than a wet or dirty bed. Brian

@TheHangedKing Welcome! I have had incontinence on and off all of my life, due to my CP and other reasons. when I was a young kid, I was constantly going back and forth to rehab to help myself deal with certain situations that had to do with my CP. when I ended up getting through both of those particular situations, I ended up in diapers for a good share of the time I was in rehab. Part of the reason that was is because when you're in a pediatric rehab center, they want you to be able to not have an accident by falling out of your chair whatever, so basically I started by doing the bathroom thing, And then slowly but surely I would lose my mobility by being wheelchair bound and then diapered. although the idea of having this happen is not a bad idea, it does kind of take away from me being as independent as I could. Because of that, I kind of let it slide and just went with it, but there are things that were not good either. luckily because of the situations I have dealt with, i've dealt with my incontinence very well I think, and I think I will be able to help very many people, just like I do on daily diapers. Welcome to incont.org And I hope to hear from you soon! it is always good to have supports and friends when you're dealing with a journey such as this, And I've been dealing with it on and off all of my life, but I am so glad that I have good friends here and other places to help me get through it. it is my intention to try to help as many people as I can in in both places as well. each situation will be different Each domain is different, so each of the situations you run into will be totally different, while some of them may end up crossing over, but for the most part incontinence will be be something that is important to deal with and to understand. hopefully when I am helping someone else, they will be able to do the same for me by allowing me to get a different perspective on each situation. My main concern is that people need to realize that incontinence is nothing to fear, diapers are nothing to fear, and the ability to treat it should be nothing to fear. the idea is that you need to make the decision that is in your best interest, and hopefully when we end up talking to several users as they come on, we will be able to give them the best advice possible so they can make informed decisions. @Incont Restarted this domain so that we would have a place to discuss incontinence and treatment options as well as bed wedding and other things that are part of that particular spectrum. And I'm glad that he did! there are many people that look for information about incontinence, in most of the information that is dealing with incontinence can be confusing and all over the place. By that I mean one person will tell you the best thing to do is use medicine, one time someone will tell you the best way to do it is to exercise, the next thing that will tell you is that they need to do something and take a pill, and the other spectrum is spectrum is to use diapers or other particular solutions. Here on incont.org, at least that way we can discuss those options, and decide, by everyone else's input What is the appropriate way to solve issues. many of us have been dealing with incontinence for years, and the problem is is that there are so many places out there that want to try to sell you that solution their solution is the best, And I am of the opinion that medicine is appropriate in some cases, but in others, all it does is make it so you have to pay for medicine, just so that you can be can be on it. I am of the opinion that if something works really well, you should use it. One of the things that is important is that information about incontinence should not be something that will someone to believe that if they're asking for help to treat incontinence, that we end up telling them to go to diapers 24/7! this is why it is important to make sure that you always know what is being asked and you know a way to respond, Dealing with each of the situations and answering any questions, the thing is we need to be supportive. I believe this community itself will help others that are incontinent or bed wetters or whatever, find the best solutions to their problem. all solutions may not be feasible or wanted, but at least we have the ability to discuss them. far too often there are many places that would tell you that the best thing to do is to end up going with one solution over the other, But the idea here is at least when we have incont.org we can discuss those and come up with good solutions. Please feel free to follow me if you wish And also to private message me here. it'll be an interesting thing to see how many people continue to join, and I notice that we are getting a lot of people coming in that are looking for help, And that's always good. It's always good to be able to talk to people that are in a similar position, because some people are nervous about it, some people deal with it everyday, and some of them don't know where to start. Hopefully with the help of all of us we can be that starting point for someone else that may be in need. When I started having problems with incontinence, I knew that I had to go to DD: the people there knew exactly what was going on and they were able to help me to decide how to handle it, and I decided to use diapers to do it. each person that we help may have a differing position in a different way to deal with it, so we must allow them to explore and give them viable options. I believe that might able to do that with this site And also we'll be able to hopefully let people know that we know what we're doing and know what we're talking about. it's always good to have people that are very knowledgeable about a subject area, and the reason why I became a member of DD in the 1st place was because of my incontinence, and because I knew and trusted the people that were there, and I knew that they would be able to help me deal with whatever situation that I was dealing with. Welcome! Brian

@John Davis Usually for me, urine order isn't a problem, unless of course I have oversaturated my diapers, or for some reason I stay in the same diaper with the same cover for many hours. if you're in a diaper for 6 to 8 hours, and you keep on using it, the likelihood of urine odor being detected goes up. What I've learned from experience is that you can use powder all over the place, but you have to be careful Because when you use powder, that particular tau will will cake and cause a whole bunch of problems for your skin, so if you end up with wetness in the area of what you will be cleaning up will be Clods of powder, And that would be a mess to clean up, So you'd have to lightly use the powder and then rub it in really well, lest you end up with a bunch of mess that you have to clean up when you end up wiping down. Secondarily, when you end up with need to change, and you keep using the diaper, likelihood goes up that it begins to smell, when you take off a diaper and you're not aware of it, I can tell you that if you do not have enough liquid in your system or enough hydration, the urine smell can be overpowering, and can smell like very very very pungent or strong ammonia. luckily ammonia doesn't bother me too much, but if I were to get a bottle of ammonia and open it up I would be allergic to that. Yes, I have my diaper covers, which are really awesome, and they help me keep the smell and mess to a minimum as much as possible. I can't say enough that plastic pants are necessary, regardless of what diaper you wear, because it keeps everything within the diaper or within the plastic pants, and it also keeps the diaper in position, just like a onesie would if somebody was wearing one. The only problem is when you take a onesie offer you take the pants off, Up having it sad because you're trying to hold up something close to you, and when the diaper can expand it drops when you try to take it off, and I mean take off the onesie the diaper drops. This is a normal part of wearing diapers, the more you put in the diaper, the lower droops, but that's why you have to have good diapers, cause if you don't have good diapers you end up with a humongous leak Then you end up with a severe case of diaper rash and then it'll be a pain in the neck to clean up, and it can be very very painful If you let the rash go too long, not even the proper spray cleaner will help you, because that would even hurt you even more. It's always a good idea however not to sit in a wet diaper for two too long, I can understand that people might wanna sit in a wet diaper, and I support that, but be careful that you're not sitting in a diaper too long, because the urine and the ammonia can cause issues And it also causes a problem because what is touching you needs to be eliminated. Brian

@John Davis usually the only way I would say that I was double incontinent, would be if I was in front of a medical professional or there was a need for someone to know that. If I'm talking about incontinence, usually the word "Incontinent" indicates loss of some sort of control.. I have to take the step of saying that I was incontinent both ways on my medical records because I did not want someone to think that it was something that just came up and comes and goes. I have been Incontinent on and off all through my life And the easiest way to deal with it is to just embrace it and run with it, because it's a lot easier than having to do laundry every 8 minutes, or having to worry about cleaning up a huge mess. If it's not necessary to disclose it, I wouldn't disclose it to someone who doesn't need to know. that is based on experience, and I've seen people who are very accepting of incontinence, or need to wear diapers, for whatever reason, and I've also seen it where someone is dead is dead set against it, which means they are not accepting nor are they tolerant of it. I'm glad that most of the people that I deal with understand that, but I have dealt with situations where somebody wanting to wear diapers are needing to wear diapers for whatever reason, Is wanting to wear, but someone is not accepting or tolerant of it. luckily however more and more people are being more tolerant and more accepting of incontinence, which I think is a lot easier to accept than someone who may want to wear diapers for other reasons, but at least there are more people that are more accepting of incontinence. the thing that people have to realize is people that are dealing with incontinence are dealing with it the way they need to deal with it for their own protection as well as their own way of being confident that what they are doing is proper. if a person has their own peace of mind, because they know that they're dealing with something that can be annoying or inconvenient at times, Then they feel a lot better because they know they are dealing with something that is not really dangerous per se, as opposed to something where you would have a medical issue that requires medical medical medical intervention because of the seriousness of the problem. and continents can be serious, but as I said in my case incontinence is a one on my scale of 1 to 10 on the things that I consider to be important to worry about. I have incontinence and have accepted it, And as such taken the necessary steps to be able to deal with it. sometimes things change and you may have to change Some of the ways you deal with it as incontinence progresses or may get worse, But if you have a good plan being incontinent is not a big deal because people that deal with it daily have ways they deal with it And they deal with it with the tact and skill that many people learn, and some people may even be scared about it, but that's why we need to be here to help others come because incontinence is not something to be worried about, as long as there are no other medical problems that are being dealt with with it. the most important thing is that incontinence is something that can be managed And regardless of what you decide to do to manage, there are ways to deal with it, without causing too much difficulty for the people that are dealing with it. Brian

@zzyzx @Incont I'm sure that there is some sort of Gremlin in the system, And yes I can attest to the fact that for some reason after so much time has elapsed, there is a warning that comes up that says that you are no longer able to edit the post. The last time I saw something that acted similar to this was on daily diapers one day, when I was in the middle of editing a post, And for example Mikey had decided that he wanted to delete the thread entirely, so when I ended up pressing the post button, the post was already gone, and that's OK, because that to me is normal. However I've never seen it where after so much time when you're trying to edit, The post is locked and unable to be edited period To me that makes no sense, because on daily diapers for example, people make mistakes and all you have to do is go up and hit the three dots and go to edit And you can edit that thing 100 times or more and it won't even give you that warning, but as Mikey has stated it's probably something that needs to be adjusted, and I'm sure that Mikey will be able to figure it out and be able to fix it, it just takes time, and each time you set up a new board, regardless of how good you are in your software, newer versions of software and new additions can make it a little bit hectic 'cause you're trying to learn your new system and how it works. Each new update comes can sometimes break others, so that can be an issue. Brian

@John Davis Yes! absolutely! when I decided that I was going to wear diapers 24/7, I decided that I was going to test things out for a while. By that I meant, I didn't know if I was going to need for example the gloves, and the disposal bags, but I knew I needed the canned and the liners that go with it, And after a while I picked up the bags and the gloves and the trifectas because it's always a good idea to have the covers so that you can deal with it so you don't end up with leaks. At one point I was using the Garywear Incontinence pants, and they were being sold by North Shore. North Shore every once in a while will decide that they want to make their own product, and they usually will for example have a product, and when they make it themselves, they end up switching out a product. then trifectas were their brand of the diaper covers, and I have had both types of diaper covers and I still have a bunch of the Garywear pants. When I found out that North Shore had those pants again, I asked my case manager to help me get some more because I wanted to make sure that I had plenty of them, because as you know wearing 24/7 you don't know what you're going to be dealing with, how many times a day you will totally soak your diapers or maybe have a blowout period from experience, blowouts and other weird situation happen when you least expect it, so I try to always be prepared. I remember the first summer after they had changed that particular product to a trifecta, I had requested my case manager spend over $1400 on my behalf, an 800 of that was with the trifectas. when I did that, I requested 6 of each color So I had six pink 6 black 6 blue and six white. So I am very familiar with their products and I love them. I like them I like them because these PUL covers contain everything that you need contained within either the diaper or the pants. And if you pull him up far enough they seal up almost anything, and keep it where it belongs. I also wear different colors, and that's why I wanted different colors, because technically they say that these diaper covers are supposed to last between 50 and 75 washings, which means that I can get away with washing them at least 50 to 75 times before having to replace them, and I wanted to make sure that if for some reason the drier or the washer ripped one of these things apart, that I'd be able to replace it. i've learned from experience that you wouldn't want to wash these things in warm water, and dry them in the delicate cycle, which is basically just cool air. I don't want to ruin them, and so far it's been pretty cool. I'm also lucky that I have an awesome case manager that responds to almost every one of my requests. She has been very accommodating and very and very supportive when I was thinking that I was a crazy old fool, And when I explained my full situation along with the way I was feeling and how diapers would help me and having all of the equipment, she said no problem, and it was like asking for a dollar for an ice cream! very simple very straightforward and I was very happy. This is why it's always important to have people to support you. I have helped many people on daily diapers for example, and many of them were nervous as hell about how to deal with their incontinence, or how to tell somebody that they love that they're dealing with it, because they're afraid of what will happen. I admit that when I started dealing with it myself, and I had accidents and things, I was kinda nervous myself because I was afraid of what people would say Do believe or think period Now that I understand what I'm dealing with, it's very easy to deal with.. my problem is that there are many people in the world that are accepting of incontinence, but there's always these other people that are dead set against it, and are repulsed by it, and because of that they think that wearing diapers is somehow wrong, bad, or inappropriate, when really the best thing for anyone who is dealing with incontinence is to be able to deal with it in an appropriate manner, and in my case, I would think it would be important that a person be able to deal with their incontinence using diapers, and in my case having no fear of the fact that you have to use the diapers, and the idea of having diapers is so you can stay dry when you need to release. when you're using diapers, they help you to deal with something that is very difficult for some people to deal with, because they don't have any control, and that is part of what incontinence means You don't have any control at all, but if you know how to control it by having the proper equipment it makes it a lot easier. people that think diapers are bad really need to think about why they think they're bad, Because they think something is bad They end up making people feel bad, or they make snap judgments that say they don't want to wear, when obviously diapers are useful, and I'm glad that most people understand that. There is a reason why we deal with incontinence using different methods. it all depends on the person that's dealing with the situation. some people use medicine, some people use exercises, sometimes people use pull up underwear or pads, And some people use diapers 24/7, or a mix of diapers when they need protection their daily diaper may not be able to provide, and they might need heavier diapers for times when they need the protection and they don't worry about being discreet, all of the times they want discreetness, and it all depends on the situation. Whatever the situation, it boggles my mind that some people would think that wearing diapers is somehow bad, even if they don't understand why people want to wear diapers, Because incontinence is a reason for wearing diapers, and as far as I can tell if you're wearing diapers, you have a reason And in my case it's incontinence. When you deal with wearing diapers 24/7, you expect that you're going to use them, And as you're using them every day you may lose some of your control so that you have to wear diapers. People who are dead set against people wearing diapers for whatever reason because of their thought process or their beliefs sometimes cause more trouble because they think it's bad wrong or inappropriate, when in actuality wearing a diaper could make the person more comfortable more confident and who really wants to be incontinent and then constantly be wet and uncomfortable? many people may say that they don't want diapers because of the stigma, but I would rather have a dry diaper and dry pants, and then wet the diaper and then have dry pants still because I have the right protections. People have to realize that people make decisions about things like this and some of them are not easy to make, so the best thing that you can do is to be supportive of a person who makes those choices, even if you may not decide that, you should always be supportive, which is what I try to do. Brian

@John Davis one of the things that I like about Mega Max's are that they have colors. I learned from experience that there are people who use diapers every day, and sometimes people don't like the plain white clinical diapers all the time, because that is like having a big sign that says that they wear diapers, and also if you have colorful diapers, that might be a way that you deal with the fact that you are incontinent, you might add the colors to make it fun, or to say to yourself since you have to wear diapers you might as well make diapers something that is at least tolerable to wear. I for some reason like the pink mega maxes, because they remind me of the old style loves from the 90s the loves for girls for example, and they're the same color. my cousin used to wear these type of diapers, and I guess the pink ones were something that I really liked, talking to other people on daily diapers, I found that some girls like the fact that guys wear pink, and that pink is not just for girls. I like the pink, And sometimes I wish they'd come out with a purple one, but we'll have to see if a mega mega Max comes out in that color. Wearing colored diapers or colored diaper covers can also be an advantage Because if someone doesn't see your diapers,, they may not get the idea that they that are wearing diapers, because you're wearing something that covers your diapers. Diaper covers help me to keep the diaper in position and to allow me to use it should the need arise, without worrying about flooding it. sometimes you just can't help it and you have to release a lot in a hurry, but you have to also remember that you should try to control your release as much as you can. wearing colored diapers will hopefully be another way to make it make it so it's not deadly obvious that you're wearing a diaper, because it's not crinkly great big and white. I can have a great big pink diaper that crinkles as well, but people won't be walking up behind you and pulling your pants down to see if you have a diaper on either! Where in colored diapers don't bother me, because I need them, and I might as well enjoy it, I always liked colors, this gives me the opportunity to wear colors and jazz it up a little. And it also gives me the confidence that I can use a diaper when I need it. I'm not sure about people that wear cloth diapers, but I've heard that cough diapers are really awesome as well, because they're really soft and you can really feel small in a diaper like that, but because I don't want to be washing diapers every day, doing it with Cloth diapers maybe a maybe a different thing, and it feels different, and the only way I would be willing to do that is if somebody was able to pin me into one of those, because the feelings must be a lot different, i've heard that those diapers are wicked absorbent if done right and you can really talk them on if you really want to, and you can feel real small. I've also heard that cloth diapers are more absorbent, but I'm not sure if that is the case unless you're wearing a lot of them. I would rather stick with my plastic back diapers for my convenience and my safety as well as the ability to not have to do laundry every other day. Regardless of what color you use whether you use a white diaper a blue diaper a black diaper or a colored diaper of another sort, the most important thing is to make sure you're having your diaper covers. I sometimes use the same diaper cover because that way I don't have to worry someone's going to see a diaper, because it's all one color and some people will wonder, but I can tell you that ever since I started wearing diapers, I'm glad that I made the decision I did, and that I have plenty of colors, because it makes it easier to deal with. like some people say, once they accept the need for diapers, they might add parts of the lifestyle that help them to except it, and that way they don't have to worry anymore, because that's the way they deal with their incontinence. I wonder sometime if North Shore will make any more colors, but I know whenever I make a phone call to North Shore, there I find a new product, I'm always asking them about that and finding out if Mr Greenberg is planning on making new colors! let's hope he does, because there's a lot of colors that you could use black is one of them that we already have, the baby blue Maybe a purple or maybe a yellow or a red. If they would make the same color diapers as they did for the trifectas that would also be cool. The most important thing is if you have incontinence that's one thing, But there's nothing that says you can't be stylish and deal with your incontinence by having colorful diapers, because I've heard stories of the people that are in the hospital thinking that the diapers are awesome or they're cute, and that really makes it feel special, because people understand the need for diapers and they're not going to go after you and make you feel bad. If you can have fun with something that isn't fun, then that is a way that you deal with it. incontinence doesn't have me I have incontinence, so I deal with it in the only way I know how, with the right weapons, and I'm not trying to fight my incontinence anymore, and that is part of the problem, because if you fight something that's obvious, all you're going to do is result in causing more heartache and problems for yourself. as they say in frozen: " Let it go, let it go, Let it go" Brian